Pathetic.Life.Of.Mine

2009-02-21T03:07:00.001+08:00

tesitng

2009-02-21T02:38:00.001+08:00

testing 1 2 3

change of blog

2007-01-01T18:05:00.000+08:00

hey. i changed blog. =) learnt from meh. brand new year, brand new blog. =D

www.blindly-in-love.blogspot.com

In love.

2006-12-12T15:23:00.000+08:00

I apologise for not updating. Been busy lately. Busy with him and work. Yesterday I went to work in BoonLay. -.-" I woke up late and took cab down. OMG. $16.60. I love the auntie there.. shes damn friendly and hilarious. She kept joking with me when there's no customers. Then the security guard kept looking for me and disturb me. So she name him my "boyfriend'. -.-" When I was busy serving the customers, she was like "EH! Your boyfriend come and find you again" Lols. Anyway, the security guard said I looked like Im from China. -.-"

Xiang is no longer with her anymore and surprisingly, she wasnt sad when he broke up with her. She even got herself a new boyfriend. -.-" I was even worried about her getting hurt. Xiang is starting to treat me quite nicely and according to him, he's falling deeper. Of course I say him cos all guys say the same things.

I miss everyone. Minmin, Evelyn, Huijia, Jiayun, Jerald, Toots, Meh.. basically everyone in school. =( We'll never see each other as often. SIGH!!!!

Insecure.

2006-12-05T11:28:00.000+08:00

Okay. I didnt expect this to happen but I hurt this almost perfect guy. Didnt mean to hurt him but ... sigh. He didnt try hard to woo me or something. If yes, I'll definitely choose him cos he's really very nice to me. When Im sad, he went all the way to my school nearby and waited for me for around 3hrs, which ended up we didnt meet. Im sorry.

The next thing is about Xiang. I got so upset for him and cried multiple times for him. On Sunday, Qingshun called me and talk to me about my problems. I said everything out and unexpectedly, Xiang was in the phone all along. -.-" GOSH. Im so stupid and he said he felt so touched when he heard me crying halfway thru the conversation. Then yesterday, QingShun asked me to meet him to go his house, he got something to show me. Without thinking or suspecting anything, I just went ahead. He blindfolded me and brought me into his room and suddenly, this guy hugged me. I got shocked. In the end, I heard his voice and there he was, standing right in front of me. I told Qingshun that I dont want to see him or else I will run away or cry out loud. In the end, I really cried till rather badly but he hugged me real tight. -.-" Both of them find me very... 'Sua Gu'. Because, I dont understand their language. And as expected, both of us are back together. He is still with that girl but treating her very cold. I guess he just dont dare to ask her the question. So he requested to give him some time. Okay. I'll give. = / Qingshun said he's helping me.

At night, I got a huge argument with both Dad and Sm. I hate my Sm like hell now. I got this stupid thinking of asking my dad to choose either her or me. She isnt a good wife. My dad is sick and if she is good, she will just come solve the problem with me and not pull my dad inside. I dont want to stay at home and it's all her fault. ARRR.. i cannot describe my anger now.

tkcare.

Reap my soul.

2006-12-03T01:27:00.000+08:00

Hey people. Okay. i guess I shall help Ket advertise. Those reading my blog and are interested to get hand-made necklace. Go to my links and click on Kexian. She's selling all sorts of lovable necklaces at reasonable prices. =) You can try bugging her for discounts. =D

I didnt go anywhere today but just Grandma's house. One of my cousin talked to me. It had been like ages since we last talked. LOL. She's so pretty! and she also praised that im pretty. HAHA! =x Surprisely, she still remember my chinese name is start with MUN. LOLs.

Sorry to made you all worried but it's really not easy to not to think. I tried to throw my phone aside so that when I check my phone a few hours later, I might see his message. Sadly, none. It had been a day since I last talked to him. SIGH. Suddenly, guys are everywhere me. Out of the sudden, I got two more suitors. = / It's not good cos I just got out of a relationship. I wanted to tell YiXiang about the guys to make him jealous or something but it's stupid to do so. One of the guy is Gene. He out of the sudden sms me saying that he got my number from a friend - SHELDON. -.-" Honestly, he sound like YiXiang and he also know how to sweet talk like YiXiang. =.= Im not that stupid already. Tomorrow is Sunday and Im supposed to go out with Yixiang and his friends. *A BIG SIGH* I cannot tell who is the other person now so you guys shall guess. He also out of the sudden say he feel sad when Im sad and he didnt expect anything to change. -.-" THIS IS WEIRD.

If I got another boyfriend again, I will get killed by friends like Jerald, Ket and Toots. LOL! ARR. If possible, I will invent a elixir that can erase your memories about failed relationships. LOL. I shall name the elixir - Elixir of Forgotten Love. WOOHOO!

TAKECARE.

DRINK DRINK DRINK!

2006-12-02T00:37:00.000+08:00

Okay. I just got back from BBQ. And peeps, I am not drunk! Im just a little high. LOL. Sorry to make you all worried. =D Jerald's face was soooooo red. RED like APPLE.. A P P L E! =D And he was high too so Im not the only one. HAHAs.

WEE! I went to Tampines with Ping today and saw him. So unlucky.. but Ping asked me to think it as fate. -.-" MY ARSE! He sms-ed me and say "Wah lao, why you come here never tell me? I shocked sia" Must I report to you still where I am going?! But of course I said in a nice and sweet manner. =) Then Ping accompanied me to go and find him to talk. He was like giving me those =( face. And asked if Im okay. I smiled to him. Then he kept looking at me. So to break the awkwardness, I stucked out my tongue and he laughed. LOL! Honestly, acting as though Im okay infront of him, it's not easy. He told me that his friends asked him to choose me instead as they think I got a nice personalities. So I shoot him back by saying 'WOW! Then it's your loss. =p" And he sighed and said perhaps in the future, we'll be back again. In the future then see ba! LOL! But true what, what else can i say? Then Kenneth exchanged places with him. -.-" And Kenneth joked with me. I think he's trying to ask if Im okay. Then we just kept quiet out of the sudden. Xiang was like "Are you thinking about me?' I told him it's no longer my job and he stupidly asked if Im sure that I dont think about him? Then I replied trying not to think. and he kept quiet. LOls. Funny part is Kenneth also asked whether I missed him. and I asked him not to be so irritating. HAHas. Before we parted, Xiang said "Dont worry. I'll always be by your side". Then he tried to pinch my cheek but I moved away.

Then before I left Tampines, I saw him again. And he pinched my cheek. -.-" OH. He also explained to me that maybe he got two girlfriends is because his jobs allowed him to contact with alot of girls. I was like " HUH? then you explained to me for what?" Then he got nothing to say. LOLs. x= ARRR.. i hate my life. WHY MUST HE BE LIKE THAT?!

tears.

LIAR!! POOP!

2006-12-01T12:13:00.000+08:00

I was watching MADTV Stuart in youtube.com.. and in one episode, he said "The soul of a liar is as black as poop." So cool and true right?! LOLs. I love this sentence. I shall give Xiang this sentence. He cheated my feelings. I asked him where am I in his heart.. he tell me the girl and I 50-50% each. SHIT! Jackass.

I just got contacted with ZhiWei. He also just broke up with his girlfriend. So both of us are in the same boat and we arranged to ask each other out one day. LOLs. I told Chang about what happened and he was like "wah. why you always kena such things?" -.-' HAHA. Now I am talking to Chang. WEE!

Sad. I just got over him and now, Im sad over another guy who is a bastard. SOMEONE HELP ME.

tkcare

over.

2006-11-30T22:07:00.000+08:00

SIGH. Dont scold me flirt cos this time, it's not me who want the relationship to be ended. He two-timed me for like so long already. I had been with him for a week and he had been two-timing me for 3-4 days. DAMN. I felt so stupid now. I cried for damn long until my eyes were swollen.

I met Sheldon in the afternoon and he talked to me. THANK YOU YEN! lols. Maybe I am stupid in putting in my love so soon, and put my love into a flirt. I asked him why he still bring me up to his dad. He tell me he had no idea. -.-" SHIT LA! Made me cry. Now Im over Chang, Im sad over him. HOPE WONT SO LONG. I shall give myself a day. LOLs

I had been drinking alcohol drinks. Be it 5% one or pure one. For the pure one, I keep adding 100plus and William scolded me. LOL. I had no other drink. Then I got a lil high and giddy. Jiayun got so worried. SORRY. but im sad.. so bear with me. =)

TAKECARE

CRAP!

2006-11-30T08:57:00.000+08:00

I didnt expect myself to like him so much. It's my first time being so close with someone and the family. Now it's the sixth time I cried for him. Today it's our one week together. So in average, I cried at least 1time per day for him. You know how it felt? =/ I thought he was someone that I wanted to used as an holiday stead or something. But now, I fell into a deep hole once again. I dont want to get hurt already. I just got myself out of the Chang's dark hole. I fell into another too soon. I cannot take it.

I felt so stupid now. I am crying like hell here and he's working. Good for him then. He can know more girls and stuff. All he say is "Sorry. I think that Im back to last time, with so many girls." I even woke up early, accompanying him till so late. Now like that. I HATE GUYS LA~!!!

FISHING!

2006-11-29T00:18:00.000+08:00

As I said earlier on, I went to his house today early morning at around 9something and we met around 10something. GOSH! You know how tired I was?! I intend to just sleep in his house for awhile but he brought me to eat breakfast so I got so full that I did not sleep. Slacked till around 12plus, he tell me his eldest cousin say bring him go fishing. So I had to tag along. OMG!

Xiang and I went to buy the bait first and in the bus, I cried AGAIN. DAMN! My third time crying infront of him. He was shocked and asked me to stop crying before people thinks that he bullied me. HAHA. When he said that, I giggled. Then we went to the reservoir there. There stated clearly "NO FISHING" When I tell him, he tell me he dont know how to read English and continued fishing. -.-" IDIOT. Then I got a small cut on my leg, I had no idea how did I get it. Then I saw a small crocodile. The cousin was damn funny. He caught a big turtle and he walked up to me "EH! give you" HAHas. SO CUTE~ I was playing with the big turtle when Xiang took the turtle away from me. =( LOL. OH! I saw beautiful birds there. So FUN~

After that, went back his house and slacked again. Then off we go to meet Qing Shun. Qing Shun is his good buddy. Qing Shun is quite a nice guy because he see me so bored, he keep talking to me. If Xiang walked too fast, QS will ask him to walk slower. LOL! I like it when they sing together. =D I was so tired when we were sitting down at the playground there slacking. =/

Tomorrow must meet him at 715 at Lakeside because I forgot to return his Ezlink and IC. =/ ARR! I first time so nice to a guy OKAY! He got so upset just now. =/ Alright.

TAKECARE

=)

2006-11-28T09:20:00.000+08:00

HELLO. I dont hav time to blog so I'll blog rather lil. =) Yesterday went to work so I didnt meet him. Now, im going to his house. =D GOSH. It's my first time meeting someone SOOOOOO early just to slack. -.-" His dad was quite funny. On Sunday, I went to his house. Then when around 9plus, Xiang went to eat and the dad and his friends were like "If you dont eat, you dont go home" Lols.

O.o Did I mention Xiang's mum also passed away due to lung cancer ? She died when he was twelve years old. The mum looked like a Hongkong Actress. =) ok. i'll stop here, if i take too long to prepare, my head will roll off. =)

TAKECARE.

Foolishness.

2006-11-25T00:53:00.000+08:00

HEY.. Today I went out with Vale, Jiayun, and Vale Goh. We went to Orchard. LOls. Not quite bad but we did alot of walking. I saw Kenneth but he walked too fast. So I was like.. "OMG!" =x HAHA. Actually, I feel kind of bad because although Im with YiXiang, I keep thinking about Kenneth's looks.

You'll never know until you see Kenneth. I was bored when I met both Kenneth and YiXiang after shopping. It's like, the both of them talking about jobs and I alone pressing my phone and calling people. LOL! In the end, they cheated me to go ALL THE WAY to LAKESIDE!!. -.-" I was so toot. In the end, YiXiang brought me to his house to see his dad. I was like "HUH?! So soon?" And according to him, he only brought back home 2 other girls, which meant that I was the 3rd. I ONLY BRING ONE BACK. -.-" But anyway, now his dad knows about us. When we were only together for a day? It's like not as though we're going to last. Then went his house for awhile and off I go home.. taking a cab. -.-" $16.40. AR. All his fault. Cheat me. That Kenneth another one. Oh yea. It's also my first time seeing a feet of a guy under probation. Really got a watch on their leg. It's like a fake watch or something. SO CUTE~ =x If I say this to Xiang, he'll kill me. He's kind of fierce when I told him about Sheldon, Ping and Jerrome staying over at my house. =x

Gosh. and hes education is only up to PSLE. If im not wrong. =/ His mother passed away too and his stepmother is from Malaysia. =/ So similar to mine. SIGH

tkcare.

WEE~

2006-11-24T10:43:00.000+08:00

Alright. I just woke up. Yesterday when clubbing and it was a little boring. So I apologise to those that didnt had fun. Weian they all left before the dance floor was open. My phone was running out of batt then cannot find them. -.-" SORRY PEOPLE! I wasnt in a mood to dance so I did not. Had a small argument with YiXiang, which I had no idea why I cried. And I got a new "cousin" - DAYAN. LOL! He look so much like my cousin and so coincidence, they have the same surname! WOOHOO. lOL =x

I had been going out almost everyday so let me tell you who is Yixiang. I got scolded by Weian and Toots because of this two person. =/ On Wednesday, I went out with Silin, Vale and Szehui. Then walk walk walk, this 3 guys walked up to ask for donations. $4 gone just like that. -.-" ANYWAY~, then they just walked off. Then after one round, I thought I can sell the clubbing tickets to them. So, when we see them again, Szehui helped to walk up to them and ask them if they are interested. Kenneth was the cutest guy present but he seemed least interested. Yixiang then tell me that he'll let me know and I exchanged numbers with both Kenneth and YiXiang. That night, we conferenced till like 1am then I chat with Kenneth till 4am. -.-" Toots and Weian was not happy as I just got myself out of one guy and now Im back in. = /

YiXiang acted as Kenneth to talk to me yesterday which I believed as both of their numbers are about the same. Then he asked "Got miss me?" I said "ya ya". Cos when the both of them ask this question, I will say yes. Then he was like "You like that say, Yixiang wont get sad?" Then I got confused and stuff. Then he asked whether Im Yixiang's girlfriend. -.-" I said no. Then he said "Wah. Kenneth and Yixiang's voice, you still cannot differentiate" WAH. Then he was like saying that now hes wondering if Im a flirt. Then he like dont want talk to me and stuff. Then I cried. LOL. Kind of stupid. SIGH.

Going out already~. BYEBYE
takecare.
filledwithlove.[23novo6].

Under revolution.

2006-11-20T22:54:00.000+08:00

DAMN! I dont know what I had become. Im becoming into a bitch. -.-" DAMN!!!! I was obsessed with him and after a week, the obsession is gone. -.-" ARR!!! I feel like a f**king flirter. *Sigh* I just dont feel like having a stead or smth. HAHAs. Maybe I should just be a gamer. Stay at home to play The Sims and PS2. =x That will really be soooo no-life. You know, once when he called me during midnight, I was so hoping that it was Chang. When I see that it wasnt him, I just threw the phone aside. ARRR!!!!!!!!! Im being so damn mean. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME!?!?

I went out today with Ping and spent about $80plus. Hahas. I bought myself a new pouch, a new pair of heels and a new pair of clothes. I wonder if I still have money to go out with Vale on Wednesday. LOLs. I want to shop! Gosh. My clothes now is soooooo outdated. Lols. Tomorrow is stupid HUIJIA's birthday and I dont know what to get for her. CAN I GET YOUR PRESENT WHEN I GO OVERSEAS?! lols. =x

Okay. I told my feelings about Ken to Cf. I told him about that midnight thing.. hoping that it was Chang thing. He told me I made Ken super upset cos Cf told everything to Ken. But, two years of waiting is not easy to forget. When I was with Ken the other day, ya, I was happy but it's different from when I was with Chang. With Ken, it's only happiness plus boredom. With Chang, it was happiness plus excitement plus alot of things. ARR. now im thinking about Chang.. how great! -.-"

f**kedupworld.
takecare.

i didnt mean to hurt you but the feelings aint right. sorry bro. sorry ken.

unexpected.

2006-11-17T00:31:00.000+08:00

HELLO! Okay. I just saw him after I went to cut my hair and highlighted my hair. GOSH~ Ping was like my nanny. I pointed what color, she also say me. =.= HAHas. Anyway, I highlighted my hair red. Then, after that Ken said he wanted to meet me. EXPECTED! So I went to meet him while Ping rushed off home. HE SO SMALL SIZE! He look like dumdum Junpei. x= [IM NOT SAYING YOU]. =x HHAs. Come to think about it, he resembles Junpei. I mean the size. HAHas. Luckily im short. =x HAHAs.

He was damn quiet and I didnt most of the talking. I asked stupid questions like why no moon and stuff. Then he just laughed. -.-" Its not easy to entertain him. Ok. And for your info, he dont look as cute as the picture. He got buck teeth. But if he dont smile, hes cute. LOLs. cos he got quite big eyes. WELL, hes going to be my holiday stead. =x HAHAs. I was wearing heels just now so I walked with a lil bit of unbalance. Then I accidentally grabbed his hand. Surprisely, he held back. O.o I was so... shy. HAHA! But anyway~~, he sent me home. =) Both of us got throw to aside by Cf. -.-" By the way, do I look ah lian? =( When Cf see me for the first time after 4years, he said I changed alot. OMG! And started questioning me about whether I joined gang or whether I smoked. GOSH! He even pulled my boy away to say he didnt know i changed this much. ARR//

tkcar.e

Fear

2006-11-15T14:15:00.000+08:00

Okay. I know its bad to go for looks. lols. but.. I am really scared that he might turn out to be the opposite from the picture. Both of us might be interested in each other but we had not even met. I am supposed to meet them on Friday but NO ONE wants to meet them with me. -.-" DAMN! lols.

Anyway, we made progress. He called me yesterday and I got so high. HAHAs. His voice sound like William and then later at night, he messaged me to apologise for disturbing me. HAHAs. I was even more high then. =PpP Seriously, I think I am REALLY REALLY obsessed with him. -.-" Everyday I just want to come online and talk to him. HAHs. Hes my future boyfriend~ =x LOL!! Luckily I got Cf to help me pull the red string or I sure die. Hiding my obsession is difficult. -.-" HAHAs.
im not sure whether I should be happy or sad. According to Cf, he got a lil interest in me only. =/ -gone-

Im going to dye my hair tmr. =D MUAHAHAs.

tkcare.

flirtatious.

2006-11-14T09:28:00.000+08:00

WOOHOO! HELLO~ THE PRINCE IS HERE TO BLOG!! MUAHAHA. okay, I just woke up so my brain is a lil cocked up. =x muahaha. ANYWAY, I just want to blog abt him AGAIN. =x SO get ready to get irritate. HAHAs.

Im extremely obsessed w him right now. We were damn lame with each other yesterday afternoon and we chatted for 2hours. I dont know when the hell Im going to chat w him again. LOls. Anyway~, I told him that I think Chunfeng is trying to matchmake the both of us. Then he suddenly ask if I think that the both of you have chance to be together, something like that. I immediately said "Ofcourse I dont mind, LOLs. You mind?" =x Then he said "dont mind too." =D HAHA. But the weird thing is that when I asked how many ex he got. . he told me none. Is this possible? With his looks, I doubt he got no relationship in his 18years. =/ Then I said that I'll find him a Ms Piggy and he said the one chatting with him is okay. =PpP WOOHOO~ Now he owe me a bite on his hand. =) I asked if he misses me, he said sometimes. -.-

ARR~ All those flirting. =/
tkcare.

Obsession part 2

2006-11-13T06:09:00.000+08:00

LOLs. You know, for some reasons, Im damn enthuasiatic recently. I got real high and excited easily. LOLs. and of course my lameness went up. =D WOOHOO. Got addicted to videos thanks to some idiot. =x HAHAS. But I still must take them, which is only the two of them. LOL. I laughed till I could almost roll down my chair. LOLs. Anyway, both of them owed me something. MUAHAHAHAs. =x

Alright. It's 6.05am right now and I cant sleep for some reasons. Exciting over something. HAHAs. I waited for him to come online from 5plus till 1am. I got real tired of waiting so I msged Chunfeng to ask where he is.. which is indirectly asking where's my boy. =p Ended up, they went home ages ago. -.-" Luckily i didnt log off at 1am cos minutes later, he logged in. PHEW. lols. We were lame to each other and suddenly, he from Mr Vain become Papa Pig and then to Vain Papa pig. LOL! Then I asked if hes coming online tmr, he said at night. LOLs. Then he replied " but tuesday you got exam.. and you are sleeping early today. =(" WOOHOO! Although it's just words of flirting, I got super happy eh. HAHAs. Then I said "WOW! you miss me?! HAHAS" and he said yea. =D [HUIJIA, VALE.. SEE THIS!?] hahas. As I was msg-ing Chunfeng, Chunfeng said that he's a very nice guy and it'll b perfect to see me and him together. =D But of course, I acted as though im not interested. HAHAs. Then, I found out that he actually took my number from Chunfeng but Cf didnt give him. ARRR! -.-" LOLs. Talk about numbers, after he said that he missed me, I tried to be lame and said that he can contact me if he want, but he have to guess my number. and I only gave him one 9, which is at the front. HAHA. =x Then he said he'll get it from Cf. -.-" Then I said it's unfair cos I do not have his number. He just said 'OH! you can get if from Cf anytime'. -.-" LOLs.

Cf automatically gave me his number when I didnt ask for it. Cos he thought I was sms-ing him then I said I dont have his number, how to msg. LOLS. WOOHOO~ Im HIGH~~.. If the both of us got chance, I shall kick this blogskin away. HAHHAA. He's the first guy, after Chang, that I feel the same way about him like I feel the same way about Chang. WOOHOO. =x

Im going off now. My commoner, Dumdum, life just have to go on. Pick yourself up and show me those teeth. =) WATCH MORE VIDEOS AND BE AS LAME AND HAPPY AS ME. =p

takecare.

Obsession.

2006-11-12T01:11:00.002+08:00

Okay. Im kinda detesting myself. Ping once said "If you want to flirt, dont have a stead. If you want to have a stead, dont flirt." =/ Okay. I just want to say that. Anyway, 2years plus of silent love.. Im tired of waiting and for those who dont know yet, I got rejected by him on 29Oct. I felt stupid as I realised something. -.-" However, I dont really bear to do so......
Anyway, I contacted ChunFeng just recently about Nicole's party after like one year or so. Then his friend added me in friendster. I didnt really care about that friend at the first place but I got this infatuation towards him. I have no idea why. So I added him in msn but he's always offline till yesterday.[Friday]. =) ARR.
I've been waiting for him to come online since he left house today. -.-" 12.40pm in the afternoon till 1.21am now. I guess he wont be coming online even if I wait till next morning. ARRR. If he really can make me forget about the other him, I will be glad. SIGH

HAHAHA. Meh is Queen Mum. Evelyn is Princess Eum. Junpei is Dum Dum and Im Prince Cum. O.o i didnt realise im cum. -.-" If those who understand, understand. LOLs. BYE

UPDATE

2006-11-10T20:22:00.000+08:00

Due to two annoying girl, I have to update my blog. Thanks to Minmin and Vale. =x

Now is examinations period so I shall just type slowly. Just 6 more days and it's the end of O levels but I am already slacking. LOLs. I dont have the mood of studying already and Im tired of waking up so early in the morning. =/ I miss my pals. ARR!

HAHAs. I currently a little high about this guy. He's cute. =D LOL!! so.. wish me luck after o levels. HAHAS. IM GONE

GRADUATION!

2006-10-15T19:18:00.000+08:00

GRADUATION!! __ Words for my peeps :
Press Ctrl + F and type in your name. =) If cant find, means I have nothing to say to you or I forgot about you. =x SORRY.

Huijia - Thanks for being there for me each time I need you. Thanks for going to school with me everyday. =) Stay cheerful always and remember me. HAHA. I made you laugh every morning OKAY! Im like one who brighten up your day. =)

MinMin - Thanks for listening to my problems about him. You gave me alot of useful advice and I appreciate it alot. In my mind, you're a cheerful and "one-lined" eyes girl. =x HAHA. Mashimaro! =p Smile always and be happy. HAHA. Always be lame!!

Kexian - I know you since Secondary 3 and I cant remember what is the first word we spoken to each other but I'll always remember the shopping spree we had together. LOLs. I seen you cried multiple times.. dont cry so often and just think of me! =p You helped me alot, in terms of my problems and studies. Thank you, auntie. LOls. Last but not least, I also learnt how to bargain when I am with you. HAHAs. Remember to ask me along in future to go shopping ar! Dont forget me! =) I'll miss you alot. LOLs

Evelyn - Eve ar eve! You're such a dedicated Christian. Lols. Study hard and I know you can achieve your dreams. Thanks for encouraging me and thanks for always being lame with me. In class, you and Kexian can say is the closest to me. HAHA. Take good care of yourself in the future and call me out or something. =D

Valerie Loh - GOSH!. I know you since Secondary 1 and I remember the first word you spoke to me. LOLs. You're a nice girl and I think I had not seen you blew your top off before. LOls. Thanks for listening to me always. When he's with me, you're there. When he's not, you're also there. =) Stop eating so many sweets, It's VERY unhealthy. HAHAs. And whenever you see people distributing flyers, please take them. HELP THEM! =p Talk to me when you need me. =)

Jerald - My boyfriend! HAHA. This 'relationship' had been going on for a month or so. Thank you for consoling me when I cried in class the other day. Thanks for going out with us each time when I ask you to do so. You're a great guy and Im sure there are alot of girls out there that want to be with you. HAHA. STUDY HARD!! And treat your girlfriends nicely. =p

Xinglun - You're the one that always stick with my boyfriend and flirt with him. HAHA. All I want to say is.. I really want to see you with Silin. LOLs. Anyway, we had been in the same class for FOUR years. Gosh. You're a pervertic guy. You know sooo much things. LOLs. Stay funny and lame la. May you find the girl of your dreams. LOLs

Jordan - The guy behind me. You seriously a nice guy eh.. You dont mind me disturbing you always and always attend to me. Whenever I say "WHAT?!", you will give in to me. LOls. FASTER BE TOGETHER WITH HER! and stop throwing us aside and run away with other people. We want you too ! Lols. Be happy always. You're an intelligent boy, even my parents like you. -_-" HAHAs.

Jenny - We know each other since Secondary 1. I still remember you were the first to sms me. LOls. Stop hitting yourself la~ Since in the band room till every morning we go to school together. =x HAHA. Dont spend too much money cos Im always seeing you running out of cash. We were once so crazy of Derrick Ho Wei Jian. Dont forget him and me. LOls. May the both of you last and invite me to your wedding. LOLs!!

Geraldine - TEO! You are alsoo one of my morning pal. LOls. Thanks for going to school with me every morning. Remember our gossip session once? I missed it. GOSSIP with me! HAhas. Go out with me some day and talk to me. =) Stay happy and keep smiling. haha. I love your smile. =)

Silin - During exams, you sat behind me. HAHAs. You even scolded me a bitch for being good at gossiping! I will never forget that. HAhas. But what the heck.. you're praising me. =p As I said to Xinglun, I wish I can see the both of you together. LOL! Contact with me after O. OKAY?! Or else you'll regret not gossiping with me ever again. LOls.

Qianying - HAHA. i shall say you're my another music instructor. =p TEACH ME MORE MUSIC AFTER O. If I manage to have success in this path, I shall grant you 3 wishes. =PpP You're a talented girl and i seriously envy you alot. You're good in almost everything. I will definitely see you in future, right? =) You're also another bargain one. =x HAHAHA. You and Kexian should be together, you know? =x

Mae - Well, in terms of birthday, Im bigger than you. In terms of height, you're bigger than me. LOls. Anyway, I kinda see you as an elder sister or something as you're taller. LOls. You seriously have a funky personality. A compliment for you : If you go abroad, you wil be one of the bitches there. =x IT'S A COMPLIMENT HOR!! Cos by saying that, you will be one of the Ms Popular. LOls. Be a model next time.. I shall see your face in TV. If not, you will...... =x

SzeHui - You also listened to my problems. HAHAs. Thank you. Dont trip over the stairs the next time round. Be like me.. Even if you're late, just take your own sweet time and let the person wait. =x HAHas. =x Last with him. =)

Glenn - Ever since you moved to sit infront of me, you made my life miserable. HAHA. If you go JC or what, dont squeeze people already!! hahas. I know you had fun disturbing me anyway. =P You're a nice guy and you provide me with sweets. HAHAs. Stay happy and sporty. WOOHOO~!

YuanLin - My sweets provider! HAhas. You're adorable. I love your cheeks. HAhas. Study hard and may your love life be good. =) It hurts to see you cry. =) SMILE ALWAYS!! With cheeks like those, you look good when you smile. = )

Gerrie - You're a NOISY girl. =x HAAHs. But you're also quite funny. I remembered we quarrelled once in Secondary Two I think. Eww. I dont really like that part of our friendship but you're nice. =) Right now, Im always seeing you running about, making people laugh. Continue doing it! Hahas. I guess people will enjoy you being near. =) Stay this way!!

Kherming - HAHA. If Im not wrong, i met you in IRC during Sec2. My first impression of you is a joker. =x Joker is good. You make people laugh. So continue. LOLs. and u owe me money =P Anyway~, I know you're a not bad guy. Soo... good luck in everything you do. LOLs. and you're my god brother, aint you? LOLs. BE A GOOD BROTHER OF MINE! =x tkcare!!!

Jiayun - Sorry that I forgot about you. I didnt mean too. I SWEAR! You're damn adorable and sporty. =) I apologise for keep scratching you but it's not bad scratching you. This way, whenever you get scratched or something, you will always remember me. HAHAs. Thanks for your graduation card. I promise to return your christmas present. =) Stay happy and may things be smooth for you. =p

[ I think Im done. ] =x

2006-10-12T19:10:00.000+08:00

LOOK HOW HANDSOME HE IS!! LOOK!
=D

HAHA! im obsessed.

2006-10-11T22:39:00.000+08:00

HAHA. HEYS. it's been a while. =)

i skipped school again and I think I will skip tomorrow too. Dad wasnt really happy but he gave in to me eventually. Im not sure whether Im just thinking too much or something. I keep having cramps. -_-" I thought it's a signal to go to the toilet to do big business but I feel like as though I cannot pass everything out. ARGH. Then I told my brother "OEI, i think i got gastric flu" Lols. He immediately say that Im just finding excuses to make myself feel sick so that I do not have to go school.

OKAY!! Im definitely obsessed with the guy from that new Taiwanese band --- Fahrenheit [ Fei Lun Hai ]. Ket dislike them though. -_-" Anyway~, that guy is damn cute. =D My husband must look like him.. or else.. I will not marry. =x I will put his picture the next time round. =) Why am I obsessed? Reason is that he has a smile that can melt my heart. LOL! ARR~ Guys should have good smiles.. YOU KNOW?! =x

A letter.

2006-10-05T22:19:00.000+08:00

A Letter I wish I have the courage to let him read.

CCD,
Time flies. It had been three years but I still cannot forget you. Whenever I close my eyes, I see our memories. I hide and cry everytime but you know nothing. You only sees me as Ms Invisible. I still keep your things untouched as I want our memories back. I know it's impossible but you do not know how much I want to love you once again? = / I want to know who am I to do and how much I meant to you. Everytime I dream of you at night, I feel like calling you and say "CCD, I dreamt of you again." Now, all I can do is to say "SIGH, it's another dream of him again." I seemed as though I got millions of things to tell you, but I dont know how to put them to words.. neither do I know how to put them in actions. I dont dare to call you, dont care to tell you my feelings and so on. All I can do is to wait for you to call me and talk to me. I miss your voice, your songs and your everything. I dont know why I cannot forget you. I'm only a plain-jane and I know I dont suit you. How I wish I can make you like me again. I am someone with no tomorrows.

MMD.

SIGH

2006-10-05T21:52:00.000+08:00

I dont know what to type. Lols. Anyway, I guess after O levels then I shall decide whether I should go M.I not. My brother asked me not to waste my time there but on the other hand, Christine asked me to give it a try. HMM.. i shall see. LOls.

Well, so far, my studies is still getting quite alright. =) Oh ya, I heard that he is studying very hard. GOSH. How happy when I know that. LOls. But Nadou told me that he is still not getting good grades. =/ Im worried then. How I wish I can help him but if I offer my help to him, he sure scold me. SIgh. Should I give him a call to ask how is he and stuff? I seriously need to hear his voice. =/

Didnt go to school today. I dont find any meaning to go to school now. Why cant they just bring forward our graduation day? =/ LOLs.

Those going for Nov, it is changed to 23Nov. Can you all make it? Notify me and PAY UP. =x

Pathetic results of mine.

2006-09-29T20:59:00.000+08:00

PEOPLE! Lols. =x My results is atrocious!~ Although I passed most, i failed humanities and I think I got lowest for Geog. IDIOT. I failed because of my mapreading and my ozone layer and my choosing of locations. ARRR! So fed up when I was going through "where-i-went-wrong". For Social Studies, My SBQ cross reference cocked up, and then only got 12/25. -_-" SEQ, what I studied did not come out. 8/25! OMG. NVM~ O levels I will memorise the book till I go crazy. =x ARGH.

Now I have to decide whether I want to go Millenia Institution[M.I] I sort of think that it's a waste of them but all peeps say we should go there and try. I remind you all, it's at BUKIT BATOK! Meaning, we have to wake up around 5plus in the morning just to go to school. -_-" I certainly cannot take that torture. However, M.I does not require humanities to get in. =/ So I am kinda confused. HAHAs.

OKAY! I thank SzeHui and Vale for listening to my story. LOLs. I guess you all should understand how much I love him. ARR! Though in between got a lot of steads, I still love him a lot. Yesterday when I was walking to the Kembangan Mrt, I was like "SIGH. It's not easy to put aside those wonderful memories." I had been holding on to the memories since o3. ARR! Vale and Huijia asked me to give HouDe a chance, but what about ChangShi? LOls.

OHYEA! I kinda wrote lyrics for him. So close friends, help me check whether it's okay! =) LOls. and WONG MIN MIN.. BE CAREFUL LARS. =PpP

John Tucker must die.

2006-09-23T23:10:00.000+08:00

Today, I went to watch movie with Joce, Fish, Glenn, Szehui, Vale, Silin, Qianying, Jerald and Leonad. Surprisely, I remembered counting that I paid the counter $100 but ended up, she said I only paid $80. And Im sure I paid exact. DAMN. Then, I had to paid an extra $10. -_-" I brought out $37 and after buying tickets, I only hav $7.90 left. -_-" I felt damn lose out but it seemed like everyone had paid. =( SICKENING. -argh- Anyway, we watched 'John Tucker must die'. The show is damn hilarious but I dont like the ending and the content. Kinda... lame or something. Once again, I wore the wrong heels out and ended up buying another shoe. -_-" WeiAn helped me to pay first and now, I owe him money again. ARRR!

Jerald and I lied to Leonad that we are together and we have been together for 1month already. That silly boy actually believed our story. -_-" LOls. The funny thing is that WeiAn and I did nothing at all and we looked nothing like we were attached. HAHas. Anyway, I had fun today and Im exhausted. THANKYOU.

NOTE: Those people who visit my blog and is going for 21stNov, Kindly pay the money as soon as possible to me and confirm that you're going. THANKYOU.

Im happy yet im sad.

2006-09-19T22:16:00.000+08:00

Hey. I am back after SOO long. Shit the Prelimary Examinations. I practically studied non-stop everyday but of course, I didnt really study for Biology. But I am hoping I can pass for Biology. =D I passed my Physics. FINALLY. Not only did I passed, I got distinction! An A2!! Im sooo happy. You imagine yourself getting D7 or C6 all along since last year.. and suddenly you get like A2 near the end. How would you feel?! It's even better than striking first prize of 4-D. HAHA.

Finally it's the end of Prelims. =D I am giving my self one day break, which is today. Then, I will start to chiong work agains. DAMN. I seriously hope the studying day will end. Bibi Jie asking me to go Meridian for first 3 months. I hope I cannot make it though. SIGH.

Hes sad. Read his entry I post. How would you feel if you see your love so sad? =/ Let him be alright. Oh. Our 'day' striked 'AN-WEI' in 4D. LOLs. So coincidence. =/

His entry

2006-09-19T22:07:00.000+08:00

boredom
i'm bored.. living my life having things not the way i wan.. its really a pain to the neck.. having to see ur days passing u by everyday.. its like u know when ur gonna die but ur not even afraid.. its like u can see the sun rise n fall till the romance of sighting it gets too bored dat u fall aslp on the beach.. besides all these.. thankfully, seriously, i hav my bros.. they are like i said, angels in my life..:) i've been through alot lately.. actually all the time.. i cant stop thinking of my things.. things dat are hurting.. i hope u readers do realize... i'm bored.. hahaha.. nvm...-_- i can see dat alot of ppl out there are "attached".. good for u.. u bastards..haha kidding.. actually bless u all lahz.. at least most of u found ur right one.. i admit.. i did broke a couple of broken hearts.. its selfish of me.. i'm sorry.. but.. i hav my own reasons.. things juz cant seem right.. now datz tis ad on my screen beside my post asking. " ARE YOU SINGLE OR TAKEN?" like wtf..-_- anyway.. think i talked too much.. hoping for a better day to come.. real soon.. chaoz..>.<

his blog. im sad for him. i dont know what to do. if only i can do something to make him happy. =/

ARRRRRR

2006-09-14T23:28:00.000+08:00

I didnt know there are actually quite a few people visiting my blog. =) Not quite a bad thing. Anyway, Im shivering like hell now. As some of you can guess, YES, it's because of him. I shouldnt had gone to Friendster to check out An's profile. [ He told me to do so ]. I saw that he viewed me and his status was "In A Relationship". That's fast. I had been smiling ever since after the airport thing but now, Im like back to normal. Seriously, I dont think Im putting on a good smile and I just smile for a reason. SIGH. Damn bored. I HATE MY LIFE.

Heavily Broken.

2006-09-06T22:06:00.000+08:00

Friends, I appreciate all the concern you all showed. Sorry to make you all worried or something but I will try my best to be happy. Thanks anyway. =)

Today, I went to Changi Airport to study with HuiJia, Minmin, Jinni, 2 of Minmin's friend, Fishman, Sheldon, Kenneth and friends, and Jinni's two friends. =/ I didnt expect anything. I did laugh and stuff thanks to them. But.. around 5plus.. When I lifted my head up, I saw him. All he gave was only a fainted smile and nothing else. I didnt expect to see him there. After I see him, I dont know why.. I shiver like hell again.. as usual. SIGH. I felt so cold and fortunately, managed to borrow Kenneth's jacket. I miss him alot. I want him back badly but I cannot do anything. Wanted to say goodbye but he didnt look up at all. I saw him studying and Im very happy. He actually studied. LOLs. Sitting at one side looking at him is... i dont know. SIGH.

I said I wanted to go Poly is partly because of him. We said to each other before.. to go to the same Poly. He might had forgotten but I had not. I want to tell him that he had always been on my mind ever since the day I fell in love with him. But.. So what if I tell? His sister got one ex. The both of them were like us, quarrel almost everyday. When the ex wanted a patch, the sister dont want. Now, Im the sis's ex and he's the sis. DAMN. i feel like digging out my heart. =/

Tell you.. tell you not.

2006-09-03T20:55:00.000+08:00

You asked if it's you again. I lied once again saying it's not you. You said if you know that Im lying, you will give me a tight slap. I seriously do not know whether I should tell. So what if I tell you that the guy is actually you? Will you care? If I say that I loved you ever since and never give up at all, will you believe?

I hear stories that you go around disturbing girls in school. Can you feel my pain when I find out all this? You just come and go in my life. SIGH. I said I wanted one more moment with you.. I did but now I kinda regretting it. 3days of tears flowing down. -_-" IM SO DAMN TIRED!!

Should i tell if it's you or not? If i tell, problems will arouse. ARRR. I feel like giving up on everything. -_-"

Burn me.

2006-09-02T12:16:00.000+08:00

I guess no one will understand what I am going thru now. It's better to die then leave now. It's not easy to tell you that the person is actually you. All I can think of is you. I cry every time I think about what I know. When you asked "You liked him alot?" I said yes. But do you know it's not like? But love. and do you know how hard is it to say that you loved someone but you cannot let him know? Im suffering like hell. I dont know what to do. I need someone badly. I need a hug badly. I dont want to think anymore. But who cares? No one can really help me. I lost my happiness, my smile. So people,d ont blame me for not smiling to you anymore. I cant bring myself to give you people my fake smiles. I cannot hide my sorrow.

Guys, for goodness sake, If you already got someone in your heart.. dont treat another girl as your stead for a night. You will hurt the both of them. Right now, I pity that girl. She knows nothing but I know everything. Part of me is glad that I know the truth.. but the other part is bleeding like hell, regretting knowing the truth. I am just a toy to him and he care lil.

I am very devasted. Ping, dont feel bad and Im sorry. I promised you to be okay.. but it's not easy to stand up again. Please understand and please please stop blaming yourself for telling me the truth.

SIGH.

2006-09-02T01:38:00.000+08:00

Have you ever loved someone so much that you can cry nonstop for him? SIGH. Ping told me that he got stead when we meet up. Then why is he still so good to me? =/ GOSH. I felt like a fool. I cried like hell. A happy day being ruin.

It's a happy day cos I went to watch "Monster House" with Joce, Fish, San, Teck, Fanyuan, ChiaKeng, Jerald, Jordan, Jiayun, Silin and Xinglun. We saw Adrian Pang and his two sons. I fell in love with the sons as they are so damn adorable. Didnt had the courage to take picture with them so Jiayun helped me to take their picture secretly.

It's a terrible day as when I reached my house gate, PIng called. She told me everything she knew. And Im very greatful for that. I cried after I hung up with her. I cannot take it. I cried my heart out. I called Netto as I needed someone badly. But all I can do, was to hold the phone and cry like crazy. =/ DAMN. I feel so used now. I cried for very long and I managed to sleep. Then he called me asking me whether I cried. He asked whether the person is him. But i lied to him, saying it's not him. That even made me worse cos he asked whether I like the guy alot. and I said.. like hell. -_-" ARRR. and then he hung up on me. =_=. ARRR......

Motivate yourself.. no matter what.

2006-08-18T22:21:00.000+08:00

HEYS! LOls. Right now, I am so motivated to study~. Both of my maths obtained quite pleased results so perhaps I will not hold to tight to this two subjects. However, I am very worried for my sciences. GOSH. I keep obtaining borderline passes. =/ I dont know what am I going to do for Prelims. =(

Today we had English Block Test Paper 1. I wrote about endangered species. Readers, please worry about endangered species. They are a part of the world!! Treat them as though they are one of us. =) HAHAs.

I think I have a major problem. I dont spend wisely. =/ I spent $70+ just today!! And I was out with my maid for only 2hours!! =( But I love what i bought. LOls. I bought a pair of boots, a tube dress and a set of clothes. WOOHOO~ If only I had the figure of a model... *sigh*. LOLs.

BE HAPPY WITH WHAT YOU HAVE. TREASURE THEM. =)

AhFat's birthday..

2006-08-16T23:33:00.000+08:00

Today is Ahfat's birthday. LOLs. Firstly, I want to apologise to Fat and Eve that I could not make it to the celebration. =x DONT be angry. =D AhFat should be glad as I wrapped very diligently for his present! There were layers of newspapers underneath the beautiful yellow wrapping paper. =x But soon, that idiotic birthday boy just tore open the present within a few mintues. -_-" I should had wrapped more layers. =x Of course I didnt wrap alone.. I will die. I had Jordan and XiaoHong to help me. =)

Mr Naufal came to talk to the class and give some tips. We were a lil fed up as we realised that most of the things in the textbook were out of syllabus and yet they are tested in tests and block test. -_-' Wasted alot of brain memory. My AMaths did rather well. LOLs. DIE! I actually had alot of ws to do~ =(

Chinese class are sort of reshuffled. A1, a2 and those not retaking chinese will be in one class. b3 another class and b4,c5,c6 one class. -_-" which means I wil have a new teacher which is not a good thing! I am not used to an unknown teacher. SIGH. but I hope things will turn out to be just fine. =D

I am extremely exhausted. BYEBYE!
tkcare.myfriends. and last but not least..
AHFAT!!!!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY~ =D

Disappointment.

2006-08-15T22:37:00.000+08:00

ARRR. You know what?! I studied like mad for my physics and I only got a C6. I want to give up Physics. However, the good thing is that I got slight improvement. SIGHs. but it's not good enough. If my prelim results are bad, how am i going to go first 3 mths JC? =/

Today I went to eat with Val they all. LOLs. I had fun and I guessed they did too. We were like primary school kids, playing childhood games once again. Remember the chopstick game? LOLs. Jordan made us laugh in that game. He only left a finger. Then he just "HMPH!" and become two fingers. LOLs. You guys have to be present to know what I am talking abt. I eat alot and I think I am going to grow fat. HAHAs.

Am I noisy? Do I ask alot of stupid questions? LOLs. Someone, tell me your opinion. Lols. He complained that I asked too many questions, which I dont think i did. LOls.

TMR IS FAT's BIRTHDAY. LOLs.

WEEHOO~

2006-08-14T22:20:00.000+08:00

He called me. =) we are on the phone..~ neh neh ni poo poo. =x HAHas. Im in a very high spirit now. It's like as though I can fly and my heart can jump out because of jubilance. We made a deal to meet. LOLs. Maybe Yuren is my lucky star. HAHAs. But I dont think he will keep his words. Lols. I miss the gentle side of him. He is learning Mui Tai [ if i spelled that correctly ].. the thai boxing or smth. When I know, Im worried. Will he be hurt? he stupid say "no pain, no gain" EH? =/ LOLs. He owe me $20 since last year and he cannot remember. -_-" GOSH.

I went to BoonLay myself today and I almost got lost. They blocked the bus stop way which I always walk. I turned ONE big round and fortunately, I called Korkor. Grandma was alone and I felt sad for her. The things were heavy and I hail a cab. Lols. Grandma's very cute. When I called her to say I reached home, she was like "WAH. so fast?" then when I said that I paid $17.10 to take cab home. She laughed. HAHAs.

Liang told me that our class did rather well for Maths. The highest is 77/80 and the lowest is 59/80. =D which means the whole class got an A. LOLs. I know there's nth to be happy abt but I bragged to Sm and got myself $5. HAHA!! I got B3 for Chinese O level. Merit for the oral. = / ARR. Then must retake. -_-" I have to return him a call. so BYEBYE

Conversation, 14o8o6

2006-08-14T21:44:00.000+08:00

shawn-lost in confusion says:
oie
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
??
shawn-lost in confusion says:
nth
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
eh? liar. u oie me for nth?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
wat liar?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
ya lahz
shawn-lost in confusion says:
not happy ar?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
....
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
i said nth.
shawn-lost in confusion says:
watz wrong wif u?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
eh? nth ar. =)
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
den wads wrong w u?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
is anything wrong wif me?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
i dont noe
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
tts y im asking you
shawn-lost in confusion says:
nth
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u sure?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
ya
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
how's ur chinese?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
c6
shawn-lost in confusion says:
u?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
b3.
shawn-lost in confusion says:
ccb...-_-
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
!!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
what?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols. bad?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
no lahz
shawn-lost in confusion says:
b3 lehz
shawn-lost in confusion says:
asshole
shawn-lost in confusion says:
-_-
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols. i have to retake to get a -_-"
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u sure u c6?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
ya
shawn-lost in confusion says:
i retaking
shawn-lost in confusion says:
i aim F9
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
den gt a too? =D
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
-_-"
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
slap ur face
shawn-lost in confusion says:
u dare?!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
DARE!
shawn-lost in confusion says:
...-_-
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols.
shawn-lost in confusion says:
today u very guai lan horz?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
hha. really?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
ya
shawn-lost in confusion says:
tok back to me
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
=p
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
okok. den i dont
shawn-lost in confusion says:
-_-
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
later u angry w me.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
what?~
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
EH!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
fat, u sure uokay?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
wat?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
ya lahz
shawn-lost in confusion says:
not ok i still tok to u?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
i beat u le lorz
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
... u wont beat me =D
shawn-lost in confusion says:
dare me
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
dont wan
shawn-lost in confusion says:
den still say so much?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
haha. okay.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
what r u doing nw?
shawn-lost in confusion says:
nth
shawn-lost in confusion says:
u?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
nth too.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
ur prelims coming soon?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
iszt?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
i don kno..-_-
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
y u everything also dont know?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
TOOT =x
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
TOOT?..-_-
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
-_^
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
stop thinking abt what?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
see
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
ure nt okay
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
cannot type ar?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
really is type type only?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u sure?!
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
yaya!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
HAHA. okay =x
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
m i irritating u? =x
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
i wanna beat u up
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
den tie u
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
give u bondage
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
wads bondage? =p
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
mmm
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
go find out urself
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
huh? is it smth bad?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
later i go arnd asking, ppl beat me up
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
wont lahz
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
its something good
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
???
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u sure not?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
ya
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
ok den.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u bz?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
mmm
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
nope
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
do u know tt u reply like snail?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
mmm
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
snail don kno how to use msn
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lol. idiot.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
den y u reply so slow -_-'
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
doing somethings
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
why so kpo?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
cos im always am~
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
plus im bored!!
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
oh
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
nv tok to ppl mehz?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lazy go msg ppl.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
so only u and netto
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
oh
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
he online now?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
i tink so. but on the other hand, i tink hes away
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
cos he jus reply me a short short reply
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
den nv reply
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
oh
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
okok
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
like dat ar?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
YES. so can u stp doing ur tings? =/
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
i'm eating lahz
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
how can u be so heartless
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
cant a poor boy eat?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols. fine fine.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
ure nt poor la!!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
-_-'
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
i am
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
hu said so
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
me
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
lend me money lehz
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u rubbish.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
eh? again?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
okay!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
10cents =)
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
want?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
serious
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
20
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
when u wan?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
tml
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
wait
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u want money to do what/
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
something lahz
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
what?~
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
why lehz?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
cos at least i know my money is for smth gd
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
and not wasted.
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
mmm
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
fee
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
fee ofr?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
for*
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
somethings
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
what?
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
haiz
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
nth
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
no need lend le
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
huh?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
y cant u jus say~
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
coz i no need to borrow
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
hahahahahah
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
CHEY
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
see~
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u anihw lend
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
kidding mahz
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
where my $20
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
=p
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
huh
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
wat 20?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
las yr u took 20 frm me.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u remember nt?!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
dont den nvm
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
i for got le
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
really
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
when?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u and netto came over to kembangan at night
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
den u took frm me?
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u remem ber nt
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
ohoh
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
shit
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
sorry..=x
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
sry late reply
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
haha
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
den where is it?!
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
=x
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
huh
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
next time i pay u back
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
lols
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
nvm la
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
u jus keep it.
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
since u forget already =)
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
and sorry for late reply
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
of coz ii keep lahz
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
haha
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
kidding
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
wah~
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
okay. den i wan a present =x
shawn-wat has the world come to? says:
no
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
...
CRYSTAL _<3 says:
sell fish!

Giving Chances.

2006-08-09T22:14:00.000+08:00

WEEe~ Hello~ Im back once again. Lols. Actually, im always infront of the computer. It's my laziness that is blocking me from blogging. =PpP My prelim oral, I didnt do well I think. I said calmness as climness. -_-" GOSH! As usual, I cant stop myself from thinking about that one guy. On the other hand, what Val said is true. She said that I have to move on and not holding on to the memories.

Memories are something that one should hold on tight to. But maybe Im holding too tight.. that it's suffocating me. =/ But it's not easy to say let go. Everything, everyone and everywhere is reminding me of the memories. Now Im confused. Is I dont want to give up? Dont bear to give up? or what??

There's this near-to-perfection guy waiting for me. Yet, I gave him no answer. Should I just give him the chance? =/ but he's not the one i want to be with. =(

It hurts like hell, knowing that you have to give up. Almost 3years of waiting. =/

*Note to tt special one: I am sorry if I cannot be by your side anymore. I am way to tired and besides, you dont need my love. Neither do you need my care and concern. =) promise me you will be happy. No more pulling of long faces. =)

Things turned out to be ugly

2006-07-23T21:55:00.000+08:00

22July02 : I had fun.. Thanks to Leonad, YuanLin, Mae, Valerie Loh, Silin, Jerald, Kexian, Evelyn, Xinglun, Glenn, Sze Hui, San and Jordan. We went to Marche and paid the deposit but we changed our mind. The blur Val didnt take the deposit and eventually, the Marche earned money. =/ LOls. Basically, all we did were walk, eat, walk, eat and dash the road. Dashing the road w heels is sooo exciting. We dashed the road at the fountain of wealth there. Lols. I didnt know that Suntec consist 5 halls! We took tons of photos but no one sent me any. SO people.. SEND ME! =x A zillion thanks to those names mentioned. I am really happy that day. HAHAs.

Today I went Suntec with Liang, Sheldon, Zin, Ping and Jerrome. Sadly, things turned out to b ugly. My mood is spoilt, totally. We got bored after the meal and it's only 3plus. Ping just walked off. I thought she quarrelled with Jerrome.. Ended up.. she left cos she is upset that Zin and I neglected her. -_-" Seriously, both of us didnt have the intention to do so and we didnt know. I cannot study at all and I am bound to fail tmr chemistry test. sigh. I am so sorry that the outing is so bored. But yesterday went I go out, we planned nth but things still go smoothly, unlike today. =/

Anyway, to both days.. I would like to thank everyone for the present that they gave. I loved it. =)

Ping, you might read this, or not. I just want to say.. thanks for your present. I really liked it alot.

Few more days till my birthday

2006-07-19T22:40:00.000+08:00

Heys. I apologise once again. didnt have the time to update. Now I just want to tell all my readers that if you see me often, dont say "Whatever", "Please lor" infront of me. I might keep quiet about it, but inside, I am not happy. And friends, Soccer is not my dish. So if you dont see me participating in that game, dont go around saying "CRYSTAL la. dont wan play.. den i cannot play also."

Teachers are suffering in their jobs so respect them, no matter how much they offended you.

He called me yesterday and I didnt know until THIS MORNING!! OMG. Im not sure if he'll call tonight but hope so. -_-" I got a slight feeling not to celebrate my birthday. It's meaningless. =/ I have plans with Valerie Loh and so on but.. it might just be a meal. PATHETIC right?! But I cannot think of others things to do. SIGH.

Dont go around switching "stations". Stick to one group of friends, or at least, dont treat the other group as a substitute.

i sprained my neck.

2006-07-11T08:03:00.000+08:00

Having your neck sprained is definitely not a good thing, especially when you sprained for some unknown reasons. I sprained my neck on Saturday. When I go to school to do the c.i.p, I am okay. After doing, my neck hurts like hell and when I got home, it got worse. -_-" I can hardly turn my head and my neck is sort of tilted. -_-" I looked ridiculously funny.

I missed two days of lessons and im bored at home.. doing maths and physics. =/ I seriously hope i dont miss out alot or else i am of a disadvantage. =( I can hardly do anything with my neck like that. SIGH. Brother will wake me up early morning and I cannot go back to slp. ARGH.

Loneliness is all I have.

2006-07-05T18:13:00.000+08:00

Heys. I apologise for the late updates but I am real busy with my work and I think I can hardly come online. Perhaps, just for a little while. =) I got a rash on my neck, which looked like a love bite. -_-" Luckily my dad did not anyhow think. Or else.. Lols.

Well, I dreamt about him once again. It's kind of weird because I seemed to have dreams about him continuously for 3days. -_-" I cannot remember what are the two previous dreams but this time, it was still the both of us reconciling. =/ I wished that I did not wake up at all. = / Sometimes, I want to tell him how much I missed him through this 2 years plus, but my courage is hiding somewhere inside. I am afraid to know his reaction and of course, I am afraid of rejection. SIGH. If i really died, I will regret. =/

I am exhausted. I dont feel like going to school but I have to. -_-" GOSH. O.o Surprisely, this year.. my brother bought me an advanced birthday gift. LOls. A studying charm, the voodoo doll. =D I liked it alot. HAHA.

I'm nothing to him.

2006-06-21T23:03:00.000+08:00

I didnt sleep last night. -_-" I ton-ed in my house, gosh! I was damn bored and I have no idea where are all my friends. -_-" Hongping's in the toilet. Jerlin cannot talk because he went for some mouth operation. So I called XianNeng, but talk awhile and he got to hang. = / I cannot call Netto because he got a girlfriend now. So I went to find Him. We talked like from 12am to 7am in the morning. Of course, there are 'breaks' in between for reasons like I need to change the phone, he need to eat, he need to change phone. My bill this month is guaranteed to exceed. = /

During the long hours of chat, I think I am nothing to him but really just a friend. I am no longer the one that he truly love like crazy, his youngest love, the love that he can remember. = / It's sad to know this. He sang and I listened. I love listening to him. At the moment, I hope I was just right infront of him, looking at him. *sigh* To him or the others, his singing might be awful but to me, it's real music. LOLs. I didnt regret sacrificing my beauty sleep. =) If he found a girl again, can the girl be certain that she will love him with all and even after a decade? = /

Tomorrow is primary school gathering. Suddenly, so little people going. -_-" People just do not know how to appreciate!! GOSH!!

Cannot forget.

2006-06-20T01:05:00.000+08:00

I cannot forget the beautiful memories he gave me.
I cannot forget those wonderful colours he painted my life with.
I cannot forget the true love I felt towards him.

All I could think of is him.
The words he said, the songs he wrote for me.
Can I be the girl again?

= /

Drive his sorrow away, please.

2006-06-20T00:50:00.000+08:00

Netto just scared me. -_-" He told me that he got a problem then went M.I.A. Called him and no answer. = / I had no choice and I called Chang to see if Netto's with him. Then Netto was actually at home and he didnt pick up my call is because his phone is in silent mode. -_-" DAMN. I was so worried that something would happen to him. -_-"
Moral of the story : Dont tell people you got problem then go M.I.A. You will REALLY scare the person.

I stayed at home for like most of the time. I cannot go out. First, I am sick. Second, I need to complete my homework. GOSH! Then Hongping go organise a BBQ for primary school peeps. =D I am looking forward to it as it's not a everyday thing that I can bump into any of them. LOls. But let's hope it will be a success. Saw Christine today. LOls. I am SOOO happy to see her.

He's sad. I know. He updated his friendster blog, saying that his brothers found their partners, except for him. Being single is two things, a good and a bad. Good is because have more free time and care less. Bad is because, he's too free until anyhow think sometimes. =/ Can someone, anyone from above send someone down to make him happy? Send him a charming, faithful angel that guide him to happiness. He's a good guy. =) Dont let him waste his life just like that. Make sure he study well.

His song is playing in my mind. -_-"

SILENT HILL

2006-06-16T22:57:00.000+08:00

HELLO! LOls. I am bored~ My computer was sent off to Phillipines for Dad's employee to use. Since then, I had been using brother's computer till recently. -_-" Brother's computer broke down and the whole family is suffering with one laptop. -_-" Of course, Dad is the priority to use the laptop for his soccer bets, followed by brother to play DOTA and stuff. I am the last one. -_-" THIS IS SO UNFAIR!

Anyway, yesterday I was sick. I didnt went school for two reasons. 1) Laziness was all over me. 2) I had a headache. Afternoon, I thought the pain will go off so I went outside to catch a movie, Silent Hill. I thought that the movie wasnt as scary but Im nt sure was it because of my headache that cause me feel this way. I feel nauseous and giddy during the show. 0.o I ate like two piece of mint chocolates and close my eyes. SIGH! Luckily, I didnt vomit on the spot. Or else, things will be very ugly.

I bought a few new clothes which I loved a lot. =) WEE~ however, could not buy much because I owe like 3 people money. -_-" Lols. Ryan is in the house and he is so adorable! Want to take his picture but didnt have the chance. He will grow up to be a handsome dude one day, provided that he will not become a sissy. =D P.S : He's my 5 years old cousin. His dad, my uncle, is Singaporean and his mum is from Mauritius. =D

Field trip to Palau Semakau

2006-06-01T21:11:00.000+08:00

Hello~ We went to Palau Semakau today. =D WEE~ So fun. Luckily, I do not have sea sick. The boat was like ~ ~ ~ all the way. LOLs. COOL! I enjoyed myself alot. What I do not enjoy is some stuff that I saw. So angry. -_-" Scroll down for more information. =X The person said that yesterday group
was lucky as they say an otter. EWW~ I want to see one too. = / Edward, the person guiding us, said that if we had alot of luck, we should be able to see the PINK DOLPHINS, which we didnt get to see. = ( So saddening~ I am exhausted as I am out for like one whole day and when I reached home, TUITION!! -_-" LOLs.

Paul Twohill got in Top 12!~ Wo0ho0!! Support him people~ I am sorry to say this but... I dont like J.L =x Paul !! LOLs

LOOK AT THE POLLUTION! GOD~ How can they do this?!

However, there are some views that I really like. =)
[Note : See two fingers?! Not mine.. Ket's =P ]

Last but not least, the boat which made some of us threw up. = X

SHIT those neighbour's dogs.

2006-05-30T23:52:00.000+08:00

I think I screwed up 'O' Levels Chinese big time.=/ I was tough, especially paper 2. sigh.

Today I stayed back to find Ms Tay. Both Mr Gui and she told me that I most probably can only get a B3 for both my Pure Chemistry and Pure Physics. An distinction is impossible. Then how?! I seriously still not sure whether I should drop or not. HELP ME! I stayed back tilll around 2plus pm. I want to thank Evelyn and Jerald for accompanying me. LOLs. We even walked to Kallang that area there and we had quite some conversations. =D I even found out that Jerald is actually the brother of Jeremy Kng, who is from my brother's gang. LOLs. SO QIAO~

OH MY GOD!!

Doggie is injured!~ He got bitten by two dogs of the neighbour's. DAMN! I feel so sad cos I didnt protect him. I could feel the pain of his. SIGH. Usually, Doggie will run to the food. Now, he need us to put the bowl of food infront of him while he is sitting down. = ( It hurts to see him in agony. I hate the neighbour's dogs!!!! SHIT them. They bully my dog. -_-"

LOOK AT HIM! = ` (

Can you see the pain in his eyes!?

HE CANNOT STAND STILL !! =(

HE CHANGED HIS 3 STANDING POSITION WITHIN 10 SECONDS. [ SEE BELOW ]

Corrupted mind of mine.

2006-05-27T23:04:00.000+08:00

Have anyone of you got this shivering and cold feeling when you talked to your ex? Well, I have. It's not the first time, several times already.

When I did not talk to him, nothing came into my mind, nothing about him. Till yesterday.
He came and talked to me online, asking me to accompany him to chat. I did and I enjoyed it but at the same time, I have this cold feeling. I felt damn cold and I was shivering like hell. This is not the first time. WHY?! I even dreamt about him at night. -_-" DAMN! He broke up with his stead already. Im not sure what happened.

He did not bother me today and didnt talk to me. =) I stayed at home the whole while doing nothing. Brother and his grp of friends made a blog which is nice. Help animals!!

Help this two dogs. I got this from an email.

Our beautiful dogs need a good home!

Please pass this on to anyone you know that might be able to help!

Tim is a gorgeous tri-colored spotted dog who is loved by everyone that meets him! He is playful and full of character and has a really easy, laid-back personality. He loves interacting with people.

Dina is a little more shy, but she’s the one to come and lie close by, or give your toes a good licking when you’re a little down. She loves walks and adores kids and makes a good watchdog too. She’s the typical loyal and loving dog!
Both dogs are 2 years old.

We feel very, very heartsore that we have to leave Singapore and will not be able to take our precious dogs with us. They need a family who will love them and enjoy them as much as we have!

Please call us if you can provide them with a good home!

Charmaine 91279403

IM BACK!

2006-05-21T22:01:00.000+08:00

LOls. I have not been updating. =X I did not use the computer for quite some day because of studies. = / STUDIES are boring!! My mid year results aint good. =( I have to go find Ms Tay or Mr Gui to ask them whether I should drop combined. =/ Combined might be less stressful. *sigh*

On Friday, Went to Fengyao's birthday chalet with Ping, Jerome and Sheldon. I thought got handsome to see. -_-" LOLs. but i did have fun though. =) During midnight, things started to be real dry and hot. I was perspiring all the way. The air con seemed to be not working and it's my first time to sleep in a chalet w/o a blankie. I even perspire like hell when I sleep! I went home and slept for a LOOOOONNNNNG time. LOLs. =x

Then Sat and today, I was staying at home doing nothing. I played game the WHOLE day non-stop. = / PSST! I got a person on my mind now. We hardly see each other and it's almost impossible to bump into each other on the streets. I know his voice but not his name. LOLs! Just have a very good impression about him. Today on my way to class, he smiled to me. =)

lotus day

2006-04-21T23:05:00.000+08:00

recently got the lotus folding thing. our class folded like hell. LOls. it's my first time seeing the whole class so united. During maths period, when I looked around.. alot of people folding. LOls. we even took recycled paper from most of us. Then Mae and I will cut the papers to the correct size. =) of cos it's kinda out of shape. LOls. So cool. but unfortunately. we didnt do that much as 4B and 5B. LOLs. I am happy with my life now! Wee~ okay. tomorrow I cannot go attend the last day of the comprehension course because of grandmother. -_-" SIGH then at night going out with PIng they all. I sure hope nothing happened that cause me last minute cnt go meet them. =/ *sigh* GONE

montage 2oo6~

2006-04-15T00:45:00.000+08:00

Thursday : It was a success! =) I had alot of fun. lols. The matinee audience wasnt as great as the night audience. At first, it felt rather boring during matinee because of stupid audience who dont appreciate our effort. Night was fun. I met with Pingping, Jer, Jr, Liang, Sheldon, Vince, Las and MeiQi. =) I would like to thank them for buying tickets from me. LOLs. I woke up at around 5:05am just to go to the salon to style my hair. Fortunately, the salon is willing to open for us at around 6am. =) I love my hair. =D I want to learn how to style... At least next time when I go out, I will not have the same original hair as the others. =) However, I was late for school. It's my first time to be late since Secondary 1. -_-" But it wasnt that bad. LOLs.

Friday : I stayed at home the whole day and will do so tomorrow. Sigh! But brother introduced me a new game which I kind of got addicted and I sat on the chair the whole day. LOLs. How i wish I can sit on the chair for as long while I am studying. -_-" LOLs. Supposed to go bowling with Jordan they all but I am the only girl. SIGH! I missing bowling and playing pool! =( BYEBYE

Bowl and Pool =)

2006-04-08T20:42:00.000+08:00

HELLO! Wow. I didnt know that I seriously did not update for like SOOOO long. LOLs. Getting lazier each day. Sometimes, I do not have the mood to come online. No one seems to be talking to me. -_-" Today went out w Leonad, Kexian, San, Tan Teck, Junjie, Chia Keng, Fanyuan, Silin, YinPing and Jordan. =D They are fun people to hang out with. LOLs. We went to east coast to play pool and bowling. Most of the time, bowling. =) I finally know how to play pool and bowling. I am not bad for a beginner. LOLs. =PpP Once I reached east coast, San, Ket and me was waiting for Leonad to bring us to the place. There were 2 dogs near me. They are the most adorable creature I ever seen. OMG. lOls. I took their pictures for several times and I think that their owner is aware about it. =X Yesterday Mr Fahmy treated the band Pizza. LOLs. Thank you Mr fahmy. =PpP. BYE

o1o3o6 - 25o3o6

2006-03-25T22:43:00.000+08:00

The relationship had came to an end. 25days, which means 3weeks 4days. =/ He wanted it and his reasons are :

I cannot forget HIM completely
I sms too little with him
I do not have time for him
I faded feelings for him

I was like telling him not to be pessimistic and that feelings can be gained. But he said if really wait for the day I regain the feelings for him, it will be too long. -_-" Well, I cannot force him not to break so I said "Ok, Up to you" and that's the end.

He made me very disappointed 3times in a row on Thursday afternoon to Friday night. I dont wish to elaborate here but the incidents made me lose more feelings for him and lose trust. Ar.. but now it's the end already. =)

I am not dejected and will not be. So my friends, dont worry about me. However, I am abit disappointed and frustrated with Ping. [ I am typing what she replied exactly ]. When I told her about the break, she replied "huh you muz have done sth wrong.. what yoo did?" -_-" Why must it be me doing the wrong things? sigh. I detest what happened today. ARGH

Jealousy

2006-03-23T22:11:00.000+08:00

Why on earth is there something called 'JEALOUSY'? It would be very good if there wasnt such a thing. I fade feelings for him and that is for sure. I told him about my feelings and gave him cold shoulder for a few days. Ended up, we still talked to each other and things are still alright. Although my feelings fade, I felt jealous when he told me he talked to her when he was being punished. = / I felt so fed up because at first, he lied to me say she is not near from him. After that, I found out they talked. Means they are near each other. -_-" Or else how can he talk to her? Shout across the corridor? = / *argh* I wont get jealous already. Im too lazy.

I thought about HIM again. = / The current him know about it and he felt very unhappy. I felt bad but I cannot forget my feelings, neither can I hide things from him. = / I am a very bad girlfriend now. *sigh*

5days..

2006-03-06T21:41:00.000+08:00

HELLO! Now I seriously need to vent my anger here. ARRR! He gave me attitude. ATTITUDE!!! That's what I hate. We were alright after school and then we went to Sheldon's house there the void deck to slack. Sweet moments! = / I was looking at a noticeboard and talking to him with my back facing him. Then he walked towards and hug me. = D During recess, he bought me a bottle of mineral water. = )

Now is the problem. He gave me attitude twice today. First time is after we left KCC. We went there to meet Jer, Sheldon and Abigail. He was jealous about Jer and gave me attitude until we got home. -_-" NVM~ Then we are okay until 9pm like that. He sms me with those IRRITATING attitude. ARGH! Guess what is the reason of him doing so?! It's because he played game and keep dying until he felt rather fed up. -_-" Excuses. Make me so moodless now. ARR!! Stupid.

Anyway, it seemed like alot of people know. = / SIGH! -gone-

=)))

2006-03-03T21:46:00.000+08:00

HEYS PEEPS! Hahas. Today I seriously pay attention is class again. HAHA. PHYSICS! =PpP I like electricity.. especially on the series and parallel circuits. =D Went out with Liang and Persley after school. The three of us went to watch movie at Plaza Singapura. Intended to watch Final Destination 3 but we could not get in. But before that when Pers went to buy tickets for ZhiYang, he mentioned to buy. -.-" WTF. Ended up we had to watch another show - " Rumor has it " The show got my favourite actress in it and yet I find it a waste of money. -.-" We held hands in the movie. LOLs. Not sure if Pers saw or something. =PpP Oh ya. Yesterday he told me he and HER kissed on the cheek before. I felt so fed up. -.-" But what to do? He say is play play one. SO WHAT?! What if I go play play kiss with people also? -.-" But actually I dont have rights to be jealous because I had been with more guys before. =X I will end here. My eyes are getting tired. =x BYEBYE

o1o3o6.

2006-03-02T21:22:00.000+08:00

HELLO~ LOLs. I cannot depend on Chemistry already. I thought I know everything but when I do the paper, not only I dont know how to do.. there wasnt much time for me to think. And the limited time made me feel panicky. = ( I will try my best on Physics then because I seriously dont feel like dropping to Combined Science and this is my last chance to prove. = ( Pray for me!

I still not confirmed if the feelings is real but we are together. = ) The feelings and thoughts are weird because we had been so cl0se. well, I'll just let it be. As the days go by, I will know if he is the one. = )

During recess while waiting for my turn to order my noodles, suddenly in front push here and there. = / I was shocked because I was talking to Ket and Leonad. Haha. Mr Gui's lesson was fun. Oh ya, recently I got weird dreams. I dreamt that my Oral got the lowest in class and I failed my Maths. Oh god! I hope these dreams wont turn to reality or else I will sure break down. My Chinese Oral will not be a good grade too because I was too nervous. = ( If possible, I might give up studying and tell Dad that I want to go Music school. If he allow.. I will be really happy. HAHAs. I passed my English. =D Not really a good pass but I will strive higher or else idiotic brother will look down on me. = /

Tomorrow should I stay at home or go out watch Final Destination 3 w Abigail, Sheldon, Liang and Pers? [ To Ket ] If you read this, dont worry. I will still watch with you even though I watched with them. = )))

The life now is just >_<

2006-02-23T21:29:00.000+08:00

HEY PEEPS! LOLs. I am back once again. = D Life is so busy right now and I seemed to spend my money quite fast. = / Now I always bring like less than $5 to school. OMG. First let's talk about Valentine's Day. Secondly, Liang. Thirdly, Chang and lastly, a long-lost friend. =)))

My Valentine's Day is alright, I guess. I bought Liang a jacket which cost me $59.90 = / SO expensive. He is the first guy that I spent this kind of money on. He should be touched because he is only a close friend of mine. LOLs. Valentine's Day is a day which I think most people dislike and like. I received a bouquet of roses from AhDe. I was kinda touched because he's serving NS yet he asked his brother to do the job for him. HAHA! It's my first time to receive such beautiful roses. ( Well, to be exact, it's the second time cos Chang bought me a stalk of rose last time. LOLs ) Roses are beautiful. =D

I do not know why I became a green-eyed monster when I see Liang with girls. I enjoyed the time with him. But I think, it's just the jealousy of friends. He WILL NOT and CANNOT be the guy of mine. He can be a really good friend but stead? It's a strictly NO. = / *sigh* Surprisingly, A LOT of people want us to be together. -_-" Perhaps in 10years. = /

I am sure I dont like Chang anymore. LOLs. But today when he talked to me online, I felt that I could not catch my breath. I asked if I can disturb him when I am bored. He said okay but as long as I dont call to talk shit. LOLs. I hope he will study hard but he thinks that he will become a nerd and it's a N.O. Where got people think like him?! Oh god! LOLs.

I found Dawn Tay, if that's the correct name that I remembered. I remembered her going to Punggol Secondary and I didnt expect her to transfer to Manjusri. I wanted to say hi to her but I scared she will think that I am insane or cannot even recognise me because she do not know my name. It's just that when in Primary School, she always come disturb me because last time we are in the same school bus. LOLs. The world is small.

Treasure the person beside you. =))) I want to graduate faster. I hate the school and alot of things = /

I hate friends who just walked away w/o saying anything.

2006-02-05T00:42:00.000+08:00

I went to watch CHINGAY today!! It's so..... you know.. =x BORING! But at least I got to know two xiao boy boy. LOLS! They are only P6~ but they are easy to get along with as the rest who followed were Malays. = / Chingay is so waste of my time. Went in at about 7pm and yet the thing only start officially at about 8:10pm. -.-" I went off at 8:46pm =PpP then went to Cineleisure and took neoprints with Ping. I cannot scan it into the computer as most of them, Ping blinked her eyes =X Yesterday, I was being piangseh-ed by friends. I was so damn pissed off. Fortunately, I got another group of friends who accompanied me and we talked ALOT on the way. =D HURRAY to THEM! =X

I seriously hate people who lied. When you're with someone, just tell me you're with someone! I wont tell right?! You tell me you at Geylang f**king, i also wont go "OEI! -your name- GO GEYLANG!" -.-" BYEBYE!!

Attention! =x : I saw a real cute japanese guy today after I took neoprint w PIng. Hes so cute! He basically suits the criteria of my Mr Right. Tan, big eyes, good features... =PpP Im simply just crazy about big eyes boys. =P

It's February! =D

2006-02-02T22:05:00.000+08:00

HAHA. Alot of people reprimanded me for neglecting my blog. Well, BLAME MY LAZINESS! =PpP

OMG~ There's not much time left!! 'O' levels are coming! I think i am stressing myself up but I cannot go on like this!! I came home rather late and I cannot study because the room is occupied by Dad's employees. So I watched television and when I looked at the time, it's time to greet my cosy bed. =X Mdm Wee had an interaction thingy with me today. I cannot think of that word yet.. but anyway, she said that I am rather quiescent in class. -.-" LOL! Well, all I can say that she scored alot of points from me. LOLs. Shes in my top list of good teachers. =x haha.

It's isnt a bad thing to have blisters. Blisters might hurt but they do come in handy. =PpP For me, blisters saved me from doing footdrill yesterday. HAHA. I felt like a crippled though.. cos of the way I walked. =x

Let me ask you readers some thing. Do you people ever coming across a good opposite gender? I met a real close-to-perfect guy when I was 11years old through my elder brother. I believed that my Mr Right is something like him and I liked him then. But he loves another girl like hell. So gradually I met my ex, the one that I kept mentioning here. After I broke up w my ex, I liked him again. Now, when I am sure of not liking anyone, he came back. AFTER TWO BLARDY YEARS! = / He sent me an email telling me about his feelings. It's touching but .. there are alot of things that I dont know about. = / What should I DO?! I dont want to hurt a close-to-perfect guy's heart. = / *sigh* Plus, right now.. If I really go stead with him and my ex come back, I cant even promise that I will not leave him. = / Oh GAWD! = /

I am so tired! It's like we always end school so late. = / After this saturday of hanging out, I doubt I will do so anymore so people.. dont ask me out always. HAHA! I want to stay at home and study. =PpP BYEBYE.

Thoughts of him spoilt the good day

2006-01-21T23:15:00.000+08:00

Today went to Temasak Polytechnic's open house. =D Quite alright but walked quite long. I and Liang met Jerald in TP. Saw quite alot of Manjusrians. HAHA! Alot said that they are interested in TP. Like that TP sure very difficult to get in. LOL! Then Persley, Jerald, Liang and Me went to Bugis to buy Netto's present. LOLs. They helped quite alot. LOLs. Liang's name sound like BIANG =x Persley keep helping me to say Liang. HAHA! Then I saw Lynnette. She asked which one is my stead. and I told her none. LOLs. SIGH. Before I left house, Ping called me. She told me that there's this bitch who want to JIO him because of his looks. DAMN HER! She is those who 2-time. -.-" And she got rejected by him.. he said "I dont like my girlfriend to two-time" However, she will not give up so easily. WTF. I hate her! I find excuses to meet him and I used "Can you meet me awhile? I need you to check Netto's present" and he said see first. = / Its wasnt a postive answer but... got chance right? = / I asked him to call me tonight and he was so reluctant. = ( I doubt he will call. Both my house phone and cellphone are beside me. Yet there's nothing, no ringing.. nothing. = / I miss him. Make me want to patch w him. I dont think of him so much but yesterday when I saw a guy who resembles him, my heart beat fast. what does all this shit means!?!?! = /

I CANNOT TAKE IT ANY LONGER!

2006-01-06T23:14:00.000+08:00

I seriously need to cry out loud. Cry my heart out, all my organs out, even my brain. = / You make me think of you again. Why?! This is a NEW year. *sigh* I am trying my best not to think about you. HOW are you doing?! What are you doing now?! I really dont wish to keep feeling this way. I see his picture, I'll miss him - alot! Can someone predict for me whether he will come back to me? When will he call me? *sigh*

Today in school got stupid spot check for attire & grooming. I pin-ed my fringe up. I took out my necklace and my ear studs. I thought I will clear the check. However, SHIRLEY WONG said that I dyed my hair because my fringe got a little colour. -.-" I told her it's natural and she said "How can it be natural?!" HOW I KNOW?! My hair like to have colours at the spot that it like.. I cant decide!! -.-" Now my parents must be pulled into this matter and they will not like it! Rubbish school. =x

The puppy infront of my house died. Heard from my brother that it's because the owner ill-treated it. Police and SPCA went to their house. I was like wondering.. " How could it be? The owner didnt go to jail?" Maybe they just got a fine. But the punishment should be bigger! I am helping the animals to talk! SO READ CAREFULLY~ =x Animals are also creatures, living organisms! They have feelings! They feel sad, happy, all sorts of feelings a human can get. If the owner did really ill-treat the dog until it went to heaven, he/she should be charged of murder! Ill-treating is a VERY serious matter! Curse the owner. = X

I heard he is studying hard for "O" levels too. =D ME TOO! He's my motivation. = / I shouldnt be feeling this way.. = /

first day of school

2006-01-03T23:48:00.000+08:00

I dont know what to write so I apologise to you all if you get bored. =x School was alright. Mdm Wee is my form teacher because Mr Jo went to Canada to pursue his Master's degree. Ms Quek became our Biology teacher, as expected and the rest of the teachers remained the same. I became A Maths Rep. -.-" I dont like to be Rep because must do alot of things though we might earn some points. =X All thanks to Ket. She got sabotage by someone and she did it to me. -.-" LOL. But she also got her thing.. as E Maths Rep. =)

We also got class rules. -.-" How old are we to need it?! I doubt we will even listen to it even though there are penalties. Ket and I got separated. Ket and her stupid mouth. =x She was really at one end and I was at the other. -.-" SO sad. The classroom was like so quiet today. In front me is Brian, my right hand side is YuanLin, behind is Jordan and left hand side is Leonad. Not as bad as I thought though. =)

I finally finish the Wang Zi Bian Qing Wa show. I cried again~ Eww. I would love to fall in love again and have a fairytale. = / When would that happen? I have no idea!~ lols. Superband audition is coming up real soon. *sigh* Time flies~ Now it's already going to be 12am. = /

Happy New Year.

2006-01-01T03:54:00.000+08:00

O.o Brand New YEAR! i just got back from countdown. LOLs. everyone is sleeping at home and the house is so quiet.. LOLs. I met Liang at about 6:30pm. Then we went City Hall. I saw William from the Project Superstar. HAHA!. He was alone and so lonely. LOL. I and Liang supposed to meet Jeric they all but didnt do so because not convenient. Both of us saw Daniel, Constance and another guy than dont know why all give the same you-two-together look. -.-" waited for Fengyao till like 10plus. -.-" Idiot. Both of us were bored to death. LOLs. I had fun today. =) I finally saw a close up view of fireworks. =) So beautiful! Though I wasnt w someone I loved, at least I was with alot of friends. I made 2 wishes to end year 2005~ =) of course, one is for him and one is for myself. LOL. When Yao, Liang and me went to meet Jenny, XiangRong, Teo, YinPing and Nicole, I felt weird because all of them wore heels. -.-" Make me feel so damn short. Then we waited for Jerald. After countdown, went to meet Yu Ker, Tedja & Persley. Haha. HE didnt wish me. Well, at least my pal NETTO did. =x Teo, Yao, Tedja and me went home together and we waited for a bloody cab for 1/2 an hour. = / idiot. BYEBYE.. =x HAPPY NEW YEAR..

Pull me out of the hole..

2005-12-31T02:30:00.000+08:00

I thought it was Thursday today. LOLs. I didnt know it's Friday's midnight. =pPp. School is going to reopen in just like.. 3 days? = / It's fast. I doubt I will go countdown this year. No longer have no mood and the group. = /

I went out with Ket today. I was VERY late because I thought my money was in the room. Ended up, it was in my pocket the whole while. LOLs. We went to Bugis and disturbed WeiLynn. =) The popcorn chicken was nice~. I bought my school bag already and I dont know whether I like it or not. = / But I supposed it will be nicer and better than my ugly converse bag. = x We went to K box after that. =) We sang quite a number of songs, all thanks to LEE KEXIAN! = x Ket is so cute! Theres a song that remind me of HIM when I sang. = /

HIM. I miss him again. I want to hug him again, feeling his heartbeat and his warmth. I really do want him back. But he is not the same old him that I knew. = / I want to forget him completely but how to? When I contact with him, memories come back to me. *sigh* I remember the first day we met, the first day of our relationship, the last day of our relationship, the first jealousy I had for him. = / I want to hug him just once more. Hug him tight and really say goodbye. = / I thought of the day he came over to my house. Both of us hugged each other to sleep. I didnt sleep at all. I was enjoying the moment, feeling very lucky to have him. = / I didnt went to Sheldon's bbq because I couldnt find anyone. I suddenly want someone by my side. I thought of him. I dont want to be someone so close to him.. it's very difficult fo rme to say goodbye. I remembered what happened during band chalet. I felt SOOO close with him again. He was running about my mind and I was hoping he would call. A call did came, an unknown number. He and his group of friends called me to disturb me. I felt sad & moodless. God did gave me his phone call.. but it wasnt what I want. God is playing with me. = / He asked if I were angry.. I said no. He said " Why you sound so sians? Everytime I call u, you sound so sians. You no fun one." I replied " Den you go call someone more fun.." He said " jealous ar?" in the tone I remembered him saying that when we were together. = / *sigh* I miss him.. I really do. THEY called me to wish me happy new year eve. = /

something that I would like him to know.. :
I want you to be happy.. I want you to smile always like you used to, will you? =) You really look good when you smile & I like to see you smile. You did change a lil, to someone I dont know. One that is more sad and more dao. I am willing to change my happiness for yours. You took my heart away and it's always behind you. It never did left, do you know? It had been difficult for me to keep my feelings inside. I may not love you or like you as much but I still do. = / 1712o2.
I want god to give you someone that can love you more than I do. Someone that dont hurt you and can make you happy. =)

i need more time. = /

2005-12-25T23:23:00.000+08:00

I better update my blog now before I forgot or got lazy. Today is Christmas and I stayed at home the whole day studying. -.-" Of course I did not really study.. I was also playing the comp and stuff. =PpP *sigh*

On Friday night, Khoo sms-ed me and apologised to me. -.-" Saying what he could not control his temper the other day so he threatened me and stuff. I cannot forgive him just like that. Besides, he didnt spare a thought for him. He said I should be clear of his feelings towards me. I can I be?! I am doubting it actually. = / Band was quite slack also on Friday because we did Spring Cleaning after lunch. I ate alot. LOLs. =D

Yesterday was Christmas Eve. I went back to Bethesda to attend their small gathering for SCC people. It had been like years since I went back. Not bad actually. =) After that, I went to meet my family. We went to Tampines and eat seafood buffet. -.-" I didnt eat much because I dont really like the food there except for their chocolate fountain~ HAHA! So happy with my family. Sm bought me a bag for Christmas. It's the Billabong bag that I wanted. =D However, I had to buy my schoolbag as she insisted on me using the stupid ugly converse bag I had. -.-" Shouldnt have bought it. *sigh* Sm bought vodka for Brother and Me. =) I bought the wrong flavour though. -.-" So er xin. *sigh* Luckily Sm say can buy more next time. HAHA! I thought she will make a fuss when we told her that we want to drink.

I need more time! Time flies so fast. -.-" Especially the time this year. It's like.... 2oo6 soon. And I'll be sixteen years old and o lvlz will come. ARRR! Next year must chiong studies. =( My fun is coming to an end. =(

MERRY CHRISTMAS, everyone. =D

=/

2005-12-20T02:26:00.000+08:00

I am typing as slow as I can because it's very late now and I am sneaking in to use the computer. -.-" feel like a thief now. Uncle Kelvin is downstairs watching television. =/ My house is going to repaint again. -.-" This time, we cannot choose the colour. A FengShui Da Shi come and help us. = / Does this kind of thing really works?

HE got 10pts for his N levels results today. =) Im happy for him although it's just a just passed.. but I didnt express it out to him. I dont know how to. Besides, I dont find a need for him to know about this. HE doesnt care about me. Boy got 6pts. Im happy for him but I guessed Im more proud than happy for Boy. He even went clubbing yesterday. -.-"

Went to Bugis with Zin and Ping. I went home at about 5plus. = / It's early. I wanted to buy clothes but ended up, I only bought a bag for $23. There wasnt any new stock for it so mine was the last one. = / I should had bought it long ago. It was also one of those sling bag that Ping eyed on. I scared she might think that Im copying her. = /

Right now, I couldnt sleep. I dont know why and what I am waiting for. My phone is silent. No one call or sms me at all. *sigh* I will vanish now. Enter the own world of my creation. = /

YuanLin's birthday. =)

2005-12-14T23:17:00.000+08:00

It was YuanLin's birthday yesterday but I was too tired to blog. Anyway, we went to Seoul Garden at Taka. LOL! We waited for Jerald and Mae for an hour plus. = / I bought a heels on the spot w/o any hesitation because the heels that I wore was my Sm and it was hurting my leg.. BADLY! I spent unwisely. = / It's like I buy anything that I see. -.-" My heart didnt ache until I thought of how I spent. = / Unfortunately, I still got 3 blisters on my leg for my new heels. -.-" *sigh* The retest is coming but Im have not done any studies yet. = / I feel like giving up hopes on BOTH my dreams and studies. = / But by doing so, Im like saying "I dont want to be human anymore." -.-" Im exhausted~

Today I went out with Sm to Bedok. Made a new specs which I dont even know if I like it. When to the library to borrow some books for Mdm Wee's book reviews. I also went to Watsons to buy the things i need. = / It was a boring day. I told myself not to go out because I am lazy but Sm forced me to go out. -.-" I ate durians after such a LONG time. =x LOL!

I am intending to join Superband. Audition is next year Janurary. 15-35 years old can join. = / Anyone interested? = /

Back from our BBQ.

2005-12-09T00:01:00.000+08:00

I went to our BBQ yesterday. It was abit frustrating at first. It's like I paid for all the food money which cost about $40+. In the end I only got back $20? -.- They are heartless freaks. I dont know whether I should call this a success or a failure. NO COMMENTS!

HE went also. When HE arrived, HE looked rather bored and stuff. I dont like that look and HE kept quiet for very long. Until like an hour or two then HE started talking to me. -.-" I didnt really eat much because we didnt buy much because of our money. = / I wanted to buy vodka to drink but East Coast there the 7Eleven need to produce your IC to them. -.-" I dont know why but when I saw Christelle they all went to HIS table, I didnt feel good. The laughing me suddenly felt dull and I immediately grab a chicken and walked up to HIM to ask whether it was cooked already. = / I shared with him one crabmeat before that. =D HE kept asking me to do things but I was busy BBQ-ing. Liang, Ping, Jerrome, Silas and Me played BLUFF and we laughed alot because we kept giving each other combo. HAHA! 12+am, Liang, Ping, Jerrome, Silas and Me went to walk around. We sat on the sand for awhile and looked at the sky. There were alot of stars. I saw 3stars in a row and Ping told me that actually we can make a wish. I secretly made a wish... which is HIS happiness. = /

It started to rain at about 2am.. we went to the shelter and shared it with a bunch of Malays. They were rather friendly. LOLs. HE took my phone and took a few pictures of HIM and Netto. LOLs! Got 2 HE acted cute and when HE was taking, HE kept 'peeping' at me. Then after that, HE said that HE's cuter than me. -.-" LOLs. I expected HIM to delete the photos but he didnt. = / LOLs. HE suddenly went to sit under the rain. I wanted to go and accompany HIM but Netto went after HIM soon. LOLs. I know the both of them were cold but they didnt say. -.-" I lent HIM my sweater because HE very cold. LOLs! HE say HE felt cute with that. HAHA! Then, I saw the both of them sparring and soon, Netto came back. I went to find HIM because the rest were discussing whether to go Mac and stuff. HE asked me to stand on the bench also. Then I did. Then both of us sort of sparred also. LOLs! Once I stood on the bench, I grabbed on HIS both hands cos' I cnt balanced. Then I leaned forward and tried to balance myself. = / Ping shouted and asked if we want to go MAC. I shouted back "GO MAC GUM?!" Then HE say me. LOLs!

They went Mac, so left HIM, Netto and me. HE went to borrow the Malays' guitar and play. I leaned on Netto because Im very tired. The 2 of us kept very quiet, listening to HIM playing the guitar and singing. Then, it was Netto's turn to play the guitar. HE asked me to sit beside HIM so that Netto can play for the both of us to listen. LOLs. I asked HIM whether HIS back and face me so that I can lean on HIM. HE replied me "You dont lean on me, go lean on other guys." Then I didnt say anything but just sit down there and look on the floor. HE asked me to lie down but behind was dirty. Then HE also added "Shoulder still not enough ar?" and give me HIS smile. LOLs. I just smiled and continued looking down. HE played the guitar once more. HE asked me whether I want HIS shoulder not? I say "HUH? dont want.. later ba." Then HE said "I count to 3. You dont want.. then sua." LOLs. I didnt rest yet. Soon, Netto went to sit outside again. HE continued to play the guitar and then asked me whether I want to rest one not. HE said if HE count to 3, I never rest.. then no more chance. LOLs. I gave in and rested on HIS shoulder. I slept awhile while listening to HIM. sigh. I was shivering so I woke up. HE returned the guitar and went to find Netto. I was left all alone.. waiting for them to come back. -.-" When they come back, HE asked Netto to help HIM ask the Malays to sell them cigarettes. -.-" Both of them smoked and the wind blew HIS smoke to my face and I was like.... breathless. HE apologise to me.." sorry sorry sorry" lols! = / We went to Mac after that and HE went back to the boring HIM. = / Didnt talk much and didnt even say goodbye to me when we went home.

The sequence to go home was.. Yexiang & Jian Hai, Vince & Jeric, Ashley & Netto & HIM, Liang & Me. Liang and I walked a distance to take a cab. -.-" I was cold and tired.. not to mention hungry. = / Oh ya. Ping went home at around 3plus. -.-" Because Jerrome was tired. -.-" I was like the only girl with 8 guys. -.-"

BYEBYE.

I want love no more.

2005-12-07T00:58:00.000+08:00

I just finished writing the diary. Wow. How times fly. The first entry was like on 4th January.. Now it's already coming to an end of year 2oo5. =) I hope next year will be a better year for me. You know.. the show "Pa Hao Dang Pu"? It's about this pawnshop.. you can pawn anything you want in exchange for something.. For example, you can pawn your friendship in exchange for fame. If such pawnshop exists, I want to pawn my love in exchange for HIS happiness. I gained too right? Because, without love, I can never feel anything.. Be it happiness or sorrow. =) I gave up totally on love. It's just a painful thing. I will never believe in love or feel love ever again unless a guy can make me so. As I said before, I am only a clown. =) A clown with smiles but tears inside. Loneliness is all I have and all I want. HE still misses his girl. I am nothing to him but a friend or younger sister. = / Meeting HIM is really the wrong decision. Tomorrow is the bbq. HE is going. I dont feel like seeing him. = / My heart and mind are stirred with all this f**ked up emotions and thoughts. Ket said that Im lucky. Well, I dont think so. I am unlucky. The night before shouldnt happen anything but chats. = /

Dad and Sm went to Phillipines. I have a peaceful house. No one to quarrel with and shout with. =) Friends, if I so happen to change to another person, be it to the better or worst side.. Please get used to it alright? My world is turning to the dark side. I am getting very exhausted. I want to start afresh. I want to forget everything. I want to leave.. be it the world or country. = /

Back from chalet.

2005-12-06T02:23:00.000+08:00

HEYS! Finally I have the chance to update my blog. =PpP MISS ME?! hahas. My life is squeezing together to a pile now. = / The band chalet seemed to be a little boring this year. But.. I supposed it isnt that bad after all. Both days I met HIM.

3rd Dec : I went to chalet after my singing lessons. The test wasnt very difficult but I dont think I did a good job. lols. I was tired when I reached the chalet. Concidentally, Netto is having chalet also at there. His chalet wasnt very far from mine so we met up. =D We talked and stuff. haha. He is such a good friend. In the end, he called HIM to come down. So ended up, the 3 of us talked and stayed together until arnd 6+ when it is time for them to go home. Did enjoyed myself with them. =) I didnt have a good meal though. LOL! I saw the fierce side of Netto. LOLS! but abit of a joking fierce. = /

4th Dec : Didnt do much until in the morning. I didnt slept well. Dont know why I keep waiting up every hour. At night, I and HIM met up again. It's me who asked HIM out. We went to Mac and eat. I didnt eat but I watched HIM eat. HE keep asking me to help HIM buy. -.-" I went to the cashier for like 4 times that night. = / We went to the beach after that. I helped him to massage. When HE asked me to help him massage his head, I asked HIM to lay on my lap. HE did and when HE sleep, I think alot. Alot of flashbacks.. But of course, I kept quiet. HE didnt sleep because he scared I might be left alone. So HE kept talking, then I put my hand on his mouth. LOLS! I admit, i dont know why when I helped him massage, I wanted to help him massage always. = / Talked abit about our problems. HE told me that got this girl playing hard to get. HE was told by her not to have high hopes. = / *sigh* According to HIM, HE got abit feelings for her. = / I felt weird when HE tell me all this. HE dont believe in waiting. = / I also did wait for HIM for so long. Soon, it was my turn to feel tired. While we are listening to his mp3, I asked HIM to offer his shoulder. HE leaned closer to me and I rest on his shoulder. = / At first, I was too tired to think but soon, I felt weird. Imagine your ex suddenly rest on your shoulder. = / *sigh* I felt cold and HE lent me his sweater. I felt warmth. = / HE is also sick but HE still like that. = / ARR! I shouldnt be feeling all this. Is meeting HIM a wrong decision? I guess I am only like sister to him. = (

= )

2005-11-30T22:36:00.000+08:00

First, I really want to thank everyone for their encouragement after my audition. lols.

Today went to work. It's a very lousy and tiring job. Jenny and I decided to resign. We walked up and down the stairs.. yet we only earn how much?! -.-" Jer went to pierce his tongue today. I asked him to wait for me until next year after I stepped down from Band... He dont want. -.-" lols.

I met Chang and Netto yesterday at night, for a short while only. I was very moodless because of friends and stuff. I felt so left out. Anyway, I met them to lend Chang $20. Both of them smoked infront of me and I dont like it! So smelly. In the end, I walked home under the rain myself. = / While Im walking home, I felt VERY dejected. I almost wanted to just squad down there and cry my heart out. But of course, I didnt do that. I always tend to think alot when im under the rain.. = /

harry potter~

2005-11-23T14:24:00.000+08:00

This blog had been dead for quite some time. Im not really in a good mood now so I've decided to come and blog. =) Well, for those guys who heard that I joined Campus Superstar's audition, im here to admit... I did join. Unfortunately, I didnt get in. I dont think I did my best as I was too nervous. Imagine yourself standing infront of a BIG group of strangers. *phew* But it was fun. =) Good experience back then. Haha. Frankly speaking, I had joined singing courses for like 2months plus already. =) Didnt dare to tell anyone. Singing is my passion and my dream now. =) Dont ask me sing for you all.. My courage is not till there yet. HAHA!

Yesterday when to watch Harry Potter w Ket, YinPing, YuanLin, Xinglun, Ken and Jun Yong. I almost lost my phone and it scare the death out of me. x= I found in under the cinema chair~ That was definitely a close one.

Ping asked me to ton at her house but I cannot make it because of parents. At night, she sms-ed me and asked whether we are sisters when I always reject her offer to ton. =/ I was hurted. She told me that she sent that because Jerrome and her quarrelled because of Zin and me not being able to go over and ton. He said that sisters will not last minute piangseh and stuff. I was pissed off and disappointed. I told her that perhaps what Jerrome say is true and he definitely got the power to affect our few years friendship. She apologised to me and said our friendship will not be affected. Im having doubts. My definition of sisters is not to ton and stuff. It's about understanding, sharing of sorrow and happiness. What's hers? In the past, I with ChangShi.. shes unhappy that Im spending too much time on him. Now, shes spending most of her time with him and I had no complains at all. = / Im saying all this in anger. She'll always be my sister but.. i need more understanding from her. I cried for her just now. -.-" How foolish.

I'm back!!

2005-09-10T23:21:00.000+08:00

haha. Once again, it had been ages since i updated my blog. Ket had been complaining to me. LOL! =p I apologise but I am too lazy. Ok! I will write day by day what happened. =P
6/Sept/2005 : Went to eat steamboat with the 'gang'. But it's kind of sad that the table seemed to be rather small and when Jeric, Las, Liang and Derrick arrived.. we weren't sitting together. *sigh* It will be better if we were sitting together. There would be more laughter I supposed. It ended quite alright and I saw ZhiWei too. If that's his name. =x

7/Sept/2005 : I was slacking at home the whole day if I'm not wrong.

8/Sept/2005 : It was Band day. So tiring. Blow since 8am in the morning den break for an hour at 12pm then continue to blow until 4pm. WOW! I was exhausted. Dad and Sm came over to fetch me and we went to LWSSOM. FINALLY! I am a student of it but unfortunately, not officially. Must wait for the person to call me again to decide on which day and stuff. LWSSOM is so far from the MRT station and I guessed I will have a difficulty to go there when things started.

9/Sept/2005 : Shopping spree with Ket and YinPing. The day was fun and tiring. I spent 60+. Sigh. My heart felt so sour. I guess I will not be able to eat properly for the next few days. LOL~ My target was actually to spend only about $30 yet I went double. OMG!

10/Sept/2005 : WEE! I stayed at home. Nothing should happen but unfortunately, I sprained my leg.... at home. -.-" It was like I went upstairs to say hi to my brother den I slowly walk down the stairs and *piak* I could hear my bones and the next thing, I was hopping to the nearest chair and shouting for help. I was in deep agony! My dad didnt know until the sun set. I dare not ask him to bring me to see a sinseh. Firstly, I was scared of pain as I remembered when I sprained my hand last time, the person say sprained leg will be more pain. Secondly, Dad is sick and busy.. I dont want to make myself a burden of his. Besides, Sm is out of town again. I could walk just now. But I have no idea why I cannot walk out of the blue. It hurts walking and even landing my feet on the floor. = / Now, I can feel nothing. I even have a difficulty just to wobble my toes. ARR! Ping gave me a lecture just now. She said that she cannot stand me being so shy. LOL! She asked me to voice out and be more 'thick-skinned'. hhas. I envy her for having such a personalities. She's one who dont care what people think and do whatver she wants. I need time to be like her. LOL~.

I supposed that's all. Thanks for reading. =PpP

A day in KCC.

2005-08-20T23:29:00.000+08:00

Early morning, took cab to school for teacher's day rehearsal practice. It was like 7 in the morning. I was so tired. Dance & dance until 8:10am, the time that A maths lessons started. Do maths all the way till around 9:15am. Once again, we practised again then we went to the hall. To me, I felt that the rehearsal was a disaster as we are not prepared at all. Whole class become a small group. = / Ms Wong was not pleased at the first place. But we managed to persuade her. After that go eat with YinPing in market then went home to change and get ready to meet Ping Liang. As usual, I was late. =pPp Diamond also went. = / I didnt even speak a single word with him. When I said bye to him, he dao me. = / End up he sms me say he's sorry because he's having a mood swing. SO?! *argh* We studied for an hour then the person came and tell us that we are not allowed to study. -.-" We went to KCC thens. There's a funfair going on and we wanted to go look around. End up, Jiejie asked us to be stallholders. I think ALL of Sheldon's family was down there. LOL! We were in-charged in the games. I met a new boy, Jordan. He's only 7years old but he is charming. HAHA! I told Sheldon that I want to woo Jordan. =PpP Of course, I was only joking. I and Liang one team. We were in-charged on the game Guti-Guti, similar to country's eraser. It was fun looking at all the students having fun. =) This will be included in our CIP thingy. LOL! I am SOOO exhausted. Oh ya! Please don't laugh at me. LOL! I mistook a lil girl for a lil boy just now. *blush* I was so embarrassed. OMG! She even told me she's a girl, not a boy. =X -gone-

Kexian's birthday celebration

2005-08-14T01:19:00.000+08:00

I sms-ed Chang yesterday because his msn nick was "prefer to be alone". In the end, I found out that he broke up with his stead. -.-" It was around 11 something. He told me he's still outside. So I didnt bother to reply the sms because I dont wish to disturb him. Then in the morning, [which is also yesterday's midnight] Chang called me at 2.45am. I wonder why must he only call me when I sms him earlier that day? Anyway, we talked & he told me that he want to join basketball again. Talk & talk.. then he asked me to call him because he got free incoming call. After we hung up, I tried to pull the study room phone into my room. But the wire was too short, so I took about 2-3 minutes to call him back. When I call, he say me. He said that I took a very long time to call and he also asked whether I know how many missed calls he gave me. -_-" When I go up and check, it's only ONE missed call. = / We talked for less than 5minutes, he told me that he's tired. What can I do? I cant possibly say 'HUH?! Dont sleep can? accompany me." So I just asked him to sleep. *sigh*

Went to school for A-Maths lessons. Very tiring because I sleep rather little. The lesson is sort of a waste of time. Went there to do worksheet only. = / Celebration of Ket's birthday started at around 3:30pm. We went to Yuki & Yaki to eat. Spent 2hours+ inside. $20!! So expensive. =( I bought a top again. I seriously have no idea why I'll have the temptation to buy things when Im outside with Kexian. LOL! Actually, because of Ket's celebration, I almost quarrelled with Ping because I was supposed to go shopping with her. She said that our outing will always be postponed and that I seemed to have no time for her. = / *sigh* Sisterhood drifting apart? I have no idea. 2years of bestfriendship. = /

Jerald's, Ken's and Kexian's birthday celebration.

2005-08-08T23:20:00.000+08:00

O.o I didnt realise that I've not update my blog for so long. lols. I were either too lazy or find there's nothing much to write. Today celebration was alright but a lil pathetic. HAHA! From a restaurant, we went to eat kopi-tiam. =P But at least we got to watch Charlie and the Chocolate factory. The story is alright but a lil boring. LOL! Frankly speaking, I thought of sleeping during the show. =x On the way to Lido from Cineleisure, I thought I saw Chang. = / The backview of this particular guy look SOOOO much like him. Luckily, it wasn't him. =) WAH! In the morning I rushed home after school to go to Lavender area to make my IC. In the end, take photo only go home. -.-" I was pissed off. It's a waste of my time and wednesday, I have to go back there EARLY MORNING! Damnit. The celebration today in school was a waste of time also. I shouldn't have gone to school but sleep at home. 2hours of celebration, 2hours of my precious time wasted just like that. -.-" I want to watch The Maid. Stupid Liang dont want to accompany me. -.-" Irritating. Ping said that now I got new friends, I dont want old friends already. -.-" It's not true. She's always busy with Jr.. How to go out? = / *sigh* HAHA! Did I mention how perfect Wei Jian is? =D Not only he's good looking, he has a good and cute character. He's friendly and nice. EWW~ Where to find such a guy like him? I knew all this from his testimonials. I'll end here. Eyes are shutting. -gone-

My birthday

2005-07-27T23:10:00.000+08:00

HELLO! lols. I dont think this year is my year. Feel so pathetic. Anyway, Nick told me that Chang took a number from this girl. -.-" *SIGH* Today we had spelling test. It was peer marking and when I got my paper back, I was so touched! Leonad and Jerald scribbled on my paper, wishing me happy birthday. lol! Not sure if Glenn and Ken were inside too. Jerald even gave me a light punch after school. lols. I got very little presents. Many said that the present will be belated. Ket drew on my leg today during Geog. HAHA! I took picture of what she drew! =D In the afternoon, Jer, Sharon, Ping and Silas celebrated my birthday. We went to the Vietnam Cafe in Bugis. Very little people but it was alright. We even managed to take neoprints together. I dont like the Vietnam Cafe (although the boss is rather nice). The food is not to my liking and I doubt any of us liked it. I ordered a plate of 3 chicken wings, cost $2.50. I was expecting those kind of big chicken wing.. ended up, the chicken wing shrunk. =x It was so small! = / I didnt made a wish with Ping they all as the cake was already full of wax. I only managed to make a wish when I was at home cutting the cake that Dad bought for me. I hope my wish will come true!. Suddenly, alot of people last minute then wish me happy birthday. lol! So far, William was the last one to wish me =p Dad accompanied me to watch Superstar today and he liked JunYang's voice. HAHA! Weijian still rocks! =D I and Chang sms-ed today. I told him that he owe me a present, a meal and a movie. LOL! At first he only allowed me to choose one but then he said "Okok. See if I got money... But if don hav d most i buy present n u treat lunch.. haha" =D I dont mind! =x But not sure when will the day be. *sigh* - gone -

I want to erase my memory.

2005-07-25T22:20:00.000+08:00

School is boring today. Lessons and everything. I am looking forward to tomorrow but I guess I can forget about it. Well, all i can say is that she's a lucky girl to have him. I hope she'll treat him good and shower him with lots of love. I always have to put on a smile. We supposed to go out tomorrow but he said he's not sure whether he can make it. I assumed it's a no. He knows I'm sad and he's asking me to smile. He's being caring to me and it's like making me worse. I know who's that girl already. Her name is Mun Yee. Secondary 2 of Punggol Secondary. Her height is around 170. She's tall. = / I saw the testi he gave her. It make me felt like Im going in between them. This feeling is preventing me from asking him out. *sigh* But at the same time, I really want to see him again. I'm missing someone right now and he not nothing about it. =) He asked what's wrong. I'm keeping quiet. He told me that he's stress. I told him I will be by his side... as a friend. Everytime when I thought that there's a chance to be together again, he'll have a girl soon. Why?

Second Shopping Spree

2005-07-23T21:34:00.000+08:00

OMG! I spent about $80plus today. = / It's kind of heartbroken as the money was supposed to be my allowance for 2 weeks. I wonder how can I survive for the next week. I owe brother $10, Jiayun $10 and Kexian $4. Of course I will be returning the one which I owe the least. = / *sigh* I bought earrings, ear sticks, a bag, a pair of shoes and a top. We went to Heeren and Far East only. Yet, I spent alot. Same goes to Ket. She spent $90 plus. I wanted to buy a watch which I saw in Heeren. It was so nice and unique.. to me. I did not bring much cash so Yinping accompanied me downstairs to withdraw money. Ket and Mae were asked to shop by themselves first so as to not to waste their time. We walked and walked. Mae dont let me buy the watch as I might see a nicer one in Far East. Ended up, I still didnt see something as nice as the one I saw in Heeren. lols. After a few hours, Ket suddenly "Did you see a plastic bag?" I was like "huh? what plastic bag?" At first, I thought she left her plastic bag with me which I forgotten to take or something. Ended up, it's in the plastic bag of my new shoes. I was like so shocked! Actually I saw that plastic bag when I went to the toilet earlier, but I didnt noe it belongs to mine and I didnt bother to chat what was that plastic bag at that time. I saw quite alot of people today. I saw Amelene but she didnt see me. I saw Daryl, Lynnette and JiaSeng. lols!

Thanks Kexian. It's really is a surprise to me. I sort of went dumbfounded when I saw that. Thank you all 3 of you for today. =D

Advanced Birthday Celebration

2005-07-17T00:54:00.000+08:00

Today went out with Ket, Mae, YinPing and Joce. =) I was looking forward for this shopping spree. lols. I thought that I would buy alot of clothes. But in the end, I only bought a top from Far East. $22.20~ Far East's things are still so expensive even if there's a sales going on. HAHA! We went Pizza Hut to eat. I was starving. =p The bill was $42.62. =) I didnt know there's a surprise advanced birthday celebration for me. Although I looked abit 'normal', I was touched. I WAS VERY TOUCHED! =p The girls were like bullying me by putting cream on my face. = / Make my face so... sticky. Haha. Today Band was atrocious. To me, it was only a waste of time as it was raining the whole day and the parade rehearsal kept delaying. Plus, Im not involved in the concert rehearsal. Which means, I had alot of time to do alot of stuffs. = / I talked to Stefanie alot. =) *sigh* I dont know why I have this on-off thinking of Chang always. I thought I've given up but... I dont know~ = / I am still happy to see his call. I thought I saw Khoo in City Hall. HAHA! Luckily it wasnt him. =) I am thinking of Chang again~ *bang head against the wall* My mood was affected when I saw that HE added new girls in his list, and when I saw a neoprint of him and a girl. I thought that girl was his ex but I realised it was his sister. I was rather happy when I saw his profile stating that he might be quitting smoking. =) It's 17 right now. 17~ =) 1712o2. HAHA! 10 more days to my birthday. WEE~ Birthday wish. =)

Busy days. =(

2005-07-15T11:47:00.000+08:00

Right now, my whole body aches. Yesterday during p.e lessons, Kexian, Mae, YinPing and me went to play badminton in the school hall after two rounds of running. As usual, Im doing all my stunts which made them laughed. = D *sigh* He called me yesterday at around 11:36pm! I slept around 11:10pm. =( Wasted. Why must he always call when I never expect a call from him. I didnt managed to finish the Chemistry test today. One period was really not enough. Tomorrow is another usual school day because of school anniversary rehearsal. I have to reach school by 7:30am. = / Im real exhausted. *yawns* After school, YinPing, Me, Mae, Kexian and Jocelyn Chua went to Paya Lebar there to eat Long John. HAHA! We talked alot. When we walked into the Watsons, stupid YinPing went to take the Men's Perfume and sprayed on Kexian, Mae and me. EWW! Stinks. =x Tomorrow shopping spree with the girls! Not such whether Jocelyn is coming or not. HAHA! I want to buy alot of stuffs. =D BYEBYE! =p

That China Girl =(

2005-07-12T22:09:00.000+08:00

I still have to tolerate for 2 more weeks until I can do my stuff without being interrupted by strangers. =( That China girl kept looking out for me. I felt like having a stalker at home. She's cute and nice but... she's making me feel that she's irritating. = / *sigh* Dad and Sm going overseas on Thursday midnight. The house will be quiet. She kicked me yesterday when we were sleeping. -.-" I was shocked when Sm suddenly said that she want to change my name as she thinks that it is 'unlucky'. WTH! This is the name my mother gave me and I like it alot. She dont have the right to change it. = / Today for Biology, we went to the lab to dissect the goat's heart. It was cool but disgusting. I took pictures of it. =p I want to go shopping! haha~ =p Khoo called me. = / I'll end here. BYEBYE! =D 15more days. YAY! =p

SALES!

2005-07-10T22:21:00.000+08:00

Haha. I didnt know that I did not update my blog for about a week. =x Anyway, yesterday got school anniversary concert rehearsal. Frankly speaking, I was rather pissed off. They asked us to go and eventually, not everyone is involved in the damn event. -.-" I went shopping with Ping. I thought we had nothing to talk because we didnt meet for rather some time. lols. In the end, I and her talked rather alot and she even asked me about my mother. =D I bought an ebase top and shorts. Ping chose it for me. When I was hesitating to buy it, she reprimanded me. T_T She's such a funny friend. =p Anyway, I love the set of clothes though. Each cost $39 and due to 50% discount, it is only $15 each. I saved alot. I decided to go shopping every week now until the sales end. =x Sm wasn't really happy when I told her my decision. Few months ago, she said that she will not buy me any clothes anymore until New Year. But just now, she said "MeiMei, dont buy anymore clothes. If you want, I can bring you out and buy." LOL! A china girl, who is younger than me by a year, came over to my house and stay. She is actually my tenant of that punggol house. I feel that my house is filled of China people. = / Anyway, she's going to stay with me for 2 weeks 2 days. = / I wasn't happy at the first place but *sigh*. Both Dad and Sm bribed me. They paid me money so that I will be happy when that girl is around. = / *sigh* Now I have to speak proper Chinese with her and I feel eccentric. EWW!

One step closer..

2005-06-29T23:09:00.000+08:00

Wee~.. I am feeling extremely happy. I miss him like crazy and I wanted to send him a msg. But I dont dare so I just sent him a goodnight message. I didnt expect a reply. LOLs. He called me. =) He said goodnight. HAHA! I thought we were going to hang the phone just like that. But he asked me to call his handphone. =) Chatted for an hour. YAYS! Feel so great. haha! He said that his life is up and down and many people changed. I want to help him but dont know how to do so. Before we hang, I asked him to promise me that if he cannot sleep in the future at night, can he call me. He asked whether I will be awake if it's 3am or what. For me, of course I can. =p Anyway, in the end he said that he cannot really promise me as he sometimes dont feel like talking on the phone. =) I dont mind. At least he try to call to talk. I want to be there for him and no one else. =D I hope his life will get better. Im glad to hear that he go home straight after school. =) But still have the habit to pon school. -.- I believe he can do well for his N level. =) Today in school, nothing special happened. Just that Kexian kept talking to me during lessons. =x Especially E Maths. We spent the whole 2 periods talking about stuffs. When Mrs Lim passed us the worksheets to do, I totally dont have an idea of what to do. Tomorrow will be a long day. = / -gone-

CCD.

2005-06-28T23:21:00.000+08:00

Finally I changed my blogskin. Frankly, im bored of that skin. =D This skin I didnt really choose seriously, I just clicked the first few. Too lazy to search. =p First two days of Term 3 was fine. I find it rather interesting and I somehow like to go school. Ignoring the fact that I have to drag myself out of the bed every morning. Khoo is very lame. He called me yesterday and today because MJR bball students were having match at FengShan CC. He want to ask me whether I am going not. -.-" Every MJR event, doesnt mean that I will be present right? Plus, I'll never go to FengShan CC ever again. There is the place I shed tears for him for the FIRST time on Valentine's Day. = / Speaking of him, I think I am missing him again. His msn nick was "cigg is my only friend at home.. haiz.. sian.. single now" I felt sad when I read it. = / I want to ask him what happened but when I said hi, he told me that he need to go for his dinner and brb. I waited and waited for him to say that he's back. But that didnt happened. He went offline. = / I hope he'll call me. = ( Ms Quek is taking over Mr Jo on 12 of July. = / HAHA! I know what is my birthday wish already. =D BYEBYE!

Corrupted mind.

2005-06-22T02:20:00.000+08:00

I feel like changing my blogskin but im lazy and im not enough of this skin yet. =p so hope you all wont complain that my blogskin is boring. Thank you! =p On Mon, Haifeng had a match against Junyuan B Division boys. First and second quarter, Junyuan scored alot. But they started to become tired and so, we won in the end. haha! But only by two points, 53 : 51. Today I suddenly think of Chang again. Ping told me that Willson said Chang can live without a girl, but cant live without cigarettes. = ( I dont know why my heart felt sour when I heard about it. His health.. = / *sigh* I told Ping "Why would someone so perfect like Chang changed to someone so .. *sigh* I cannot find a word to describe. It's so wasted." Hes the dream guy of all girls. Yet he get influenced so easily. = / I dont know why I got this crazy thinking of getting him back again. = / *sigh* What is he doing now? How is he doing? =( Can we still carry out the plan that he said even though we're not together anymore? = / i missing him again. *sob*

i dont think i can stand it any longer. *sigh*

Enjoyable day in the salon

2005-06-17T01:15:00.000+08:00

Today went to Malaysia with Sm. Dad didnt follow us as he said that he got alot of things to do. The main reason why we go to Malaysia is because we need to visit the salon. =x I want to rebond my hair and she needs to trim. My hair isnt 100% straight but at least i got the straight hair like last time. =D and this time, is the first time I enjoyed going to the salon so much. I feel kind of weird as it is my first time going out of the country to do my hair. I have to hairstylist, Ah Niu and Mr Greenie ( i call him Mr Greenie because im not really sure whether his name is Calvin or Kelvin ). Mr Greenie is the teacher and Ah Niu is the student. If im not wrong, it is also the first time I have guy hairstylists. Anyway, Mr Greenie and Ah Niu very funny. I tried to not to laugh several times so that I wont make myself look ridiculous. Both of them like to bicker with each other. I like the way the both of them talk. So cute and they end their sentences with "wor" most of the time. haha! I suspect every hairstylist in the shop touched my hair. Got one real good looking male hairstylist.. When he sit beside me to talk to Mr Greenie, I felt so paiseh. lols. But.. too bad, hes kinda gayish. =x The second last part of the rebonding process, I had 4 hairstylists doing my hair. -.- I feel super embarrassed at that time. But at the same time, I feel like a lil princess. haha! =p *yawns* Yesterday bbq was unsuccessful. = / sad case. I missed one band practice today. *sigh* I dont like Mummy and Dad as they give birth to such a weak me. Im always getting sick. Now Im sick again. -.- Tomorrow Dad might not want me to go band. He want me to rest at home AND study at home. I dont know whether I should count myself lucky. When Im sick, Dad always bring me go see doctor. Perhaps because he scared that I might end up like Mummy. = / -gone-

The day WE bbq =D

2005-06-15T01:18:00.000+08:00

Haha.! It is finally the day I've been waiting for. OUR bbq. =) It's 6months already since we last gathered. I miss all of them. Especially Netto, he's such a great friend. Pingping invited Jessica. = / Frankly speaking, I wasnt really happy about the idea of inviting her. I cant forget how Jessica backstabbed me. She backstabbed Pingping once but I dont understand why this sister of mine can forget so easily. Anyway, I still remember what she told ZhiLong before I met ZhiLong. What she did when Chang accompanied to get me PSLE results. = / PingPing said that she might change to a better person. I hope she really did. Yesterday ( feel so weird by saying yesterday cos now is past midnight ) I and PingPing were rather pissed off. But I think that I am more pissed off. I slept at 3am the day before and I had to wake up at 11+am just to meet some people. Ended up only Alvan came to meet us. -.-" To make things worst, I forgot to take my ATM card out, which means I only had $2 with me. Both of us have no choice but to go me house and slack. I guess it was a good day for the 3 sisters [ Me, Ping & Zin ] as Zin's netball training was cancelled too and she only found out when she reached school. She met the both of us and we went to the supermarket to shop for bbq stuff. *sigh* Ping and I were so busy lately because of this bbq. I still dont understand why we put so many effort when all of them dont give a damn about this. = / I doubt I am going to ton for this time bbq. = / I am starting to panic because I have no really start any homework. =x end here. -gone-

O.o

2005-06-13T00:03:00.000+08:00

Arr! So bored. Holidays is coming to an end. -!!- So fast. I still have not really enjoyed myself. Weet! Today is my first time studying from the moment I woke up, which is around 12.40, all the way till 3 something. Lols. I was rushing my tuition homework which I faked that I've done it 2weeks ago. =p Dad & Sm went to China. Not sure when they are coming back. The next band practices, I am going to miss either one or both. Going Malaysia with Dad & Sm for dont know a day or two. =) I hope Bro will come along. It is like SOOOO long since our family go for a holiday together. The Malaysia Trip with school was fun. =D I love it. The only thing that I dont really enjoy that stupid tour guide. I suppose each time Singapore Schools go to Malaysia, the guides are from the same company. I still remember P6 went Malaysia with school, I was so unfortunate to have this bitch as my tour guide. I detest her like hell. This time, I am as unfortunate to have this stupid fat lady at first. But I was also lucky that she was being transferred to the other bus. I've got a guy, Eddy, as my bus the tour guide. He is so cool~. I like his story about Meleka. =D Back to that fat lady, she is very lazy and noisy. -HMPH!- I like chinese people tombstone. It's so cool~ =) Eddy was so brave. In the middle of the night, he and the bus driver drove to Meleka and count how many tombstones are there just to inform us! I still remember that he came out with the figure of 12,500 tombstones. =) Im starting to regret not learning history. I rather memorize those things. If got egypt history, im sure to go learn. =) lols. I HATE PEOPLE WHO GO AROUND SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT ONE WHO THEY DONT EVEN KNOW!! *_* O.o Today I watched a show and learnt that a brand new day is not a new start of life. Those who believe in this, is nothing-better-to-do people. x) BYEBYE!

Ballon Hat Festival ! ~

2005-06-05T23:49:00.000+08:00

WooHoo. It was fun today but the heat was ......... I kena sunburnt once again, twice this week. *sob* Mew mew was gone!! The cat that was being abandoned by his mother in my house. The mother returned and brought it to somewhere else 2 days ago. =( I miss MewMew alot. I thought he'll come back but he did not. = / Tomorrow I am going out with Ping and maybe Zin. Then Tues to Thurs im going to Malaysia, KL Geography Trip. = / DO miss me people! lols. I didnt have a chance to say hi or goodbye to Silas today. Thought we could at least sit down and talk for a while. = / No time for those. Woo! I am very scared that I might be more tan. I dont want~ I prefer to be fair. =x Military Band seems to be so cool but they have to practise so hard until that kind of standard. OMG. I'll sure faint if I join MIlitary band. lalala. I WANT MEW MEW TO COME BACK! *Sob* I reached home at around 8+pm today and I was exhausted. I have not start doing any revision and homework yet. =( I scared that I will have insufficient time to do everithing. how?! =x Guess I am thinking slighty too much. *sigh* Now the treasurer things are in complete mess. I still have not think of a way to settle everything and the money and stuff. = / Wish me good luck. = (

It's the beginning of June Hols.

2005-05-28T23:09:00.000+08:00

I didnt expect time to fly so fast. 1/2 a year just *zoom*. Chang called me on Thursday's midnight, which is also Friday's morning. We chatted for about 30mins. I dont feel sad when he talked to me about his problems regarding her. But, I really want to help him clear his troubles. I want to see him happy again. = / The problem is that I dont know how to help him. I've been thinking day and night. ARR! Hope can help him as soon as possible. Khoo called me yesterday ask for a patch again. -.-" This is not the first time I told him about me answer. Yet he insisted on waiting. He is also another one always making me to feel guilty. Yesterday PTI was alright. Mr Jo really motivated me to study hard. Next month, he is going off to further his studies but he is still our form teacher. = / I wonder how can I concentrate on my Bio after he go. = / I feel like going out but Ping very busy with her Rome. When I ask her out, her reply was "Meeting him" When I with Chang the other time, always accompany Chang go here and there.. She complained to me that I only care about Chang and never spend enough time as her sister. Now she's also abit turning to the past me! = / I cant say much. Just simply have to wait for a guy, who can make my heart melts, to appear. Band practices now is exhausting. Sunday is the performance and there isnt much time left. = / *sigh* Im scared. = / I'll end here. Super tired. = /

Exhausted~.

2005-05-21T02:03:00.000+08:00

I am extremely tired right now. Though it is already considered the next day, I have no idea why I cant sleep. Today got back alot of papers. I passed my A Maths! It was a close one. HAHA! I just passed. But I am rather happy as I thought I might fail. I did the paper with alot of question marks on my head. =p I passed my Chinese also. YAY! I am quite happy with the marks I got for Chinese. =D I've always been failing chinese or get a 50-52/100 for Chinese. There's a parents-teachers meeting session during be-yourself day on 27May. Im still thinking what to wear on that day.. Still got band also. = / The next few band practices.. most will be outdoor practices. Tiring. Today we kept marching and only about 4-5 5mins break. But it was fun. I am still having difficulties memorizing those notes and my reaction was slow. = / Tomorrow I still have to meet YingMae, Kexian, Jiayun and YinPing to go out. = / I am broke~ I suppose Ping and I are drifting. She wont have time for me and neither do I. Next week I'm packed with Band practices.. 1st week of hols are also occupied with band practices. I AM VERY PISSED NOW!! *argh* I can scream till my voice is gone. Jer is super unreasonable. He suddenly come tell me that he dont want the chalet already. At first I told him I dont want because no one seems to be interested. He replied that the chalet can still go on. Then now he like that. It's like.. WTF! We quarrelled. He say I am not there for him.. He got his mabel and jesslyn and new friends what. Why still need us, the old friends?! He know me for so long.. should know that I dont reply to sms sometimes because either I'm lazy or because I have nothing to reply or saving sms.. and I dont return people's calls as I believed that if there's anything important, the person will call back. He still come tell me say I NEVER return his call. -.- Now he's complaining. I cannot stand him, I went offline. ARGH! I am very *argh* frustrated at the start of a brand new life. I hope when the sun comes out, things will be much better.

Examinations

2005-05-11T22:45:00.000+08:00

Heys. Im not sure whether I will do well in my exams. = / I did not manage to finish my chemistry paper on time and I think I lost about 11marks. = / I know how to explain the last question. Damn! I dont have enough time to do it. = / Geog paper also dont really have time. Kinda in a rush. *sigh* Tomorrow is Physics paper. Not sure whether I can make it. I think I understand but I also think that I dont understand. I very scared that I might fail Physics as according to Mr Gui, the paper is difficult. My phone very idiotic. Just now got someone called but suddenly the main circuit got problem. I dont really know who it is. = / Today I am very happy. The view of him was so perfect. He was talking to his friend, facing where I was. Then I was talking to Kexian, facing to his side. Weet! haha! I stood beside him~ lalala~ But I just hope he know my existance. = / I do not have that much courage to know him. All I can is to stand at one side admiring him. = / Kes want to come over and stay for one night. I wonder why Bro have to ask me for permission. Today Mr Jo suddenly tell me "Crystal.. Please pass Bio" I was so shocked! I replied a "huh?!" He said his expectation of me is a B. = / He say till I might fail. *sob* I dont know what to do! = / -gone-

airport.

2005-05-06T23:23:00.000+08:00

Today Mr Jo gave us the bookmark he made for us. =D I love it alot. kekes. After school.. Ping, Jerrome, Me, Liang, Boy, Mabel, Jer, Silas and Zhou Jielun went to the airport. Stupid Liang keep making us laugh till I only revise 3 Physics questions. ARRR! Slap his face. Today I laughed till my jaw almost drop. lols. Jerrome worst.. Ping really had a hard time calming him down. lols. I have to study alot of things. Exams period must REALLY REALLY refrain myself from using the computer. Or else I really will fail my examinations. = ( haha. Mabel and I keep playing and act as though I like her and she likes me too. = P I like her alot. Glad that Jer went stead with her. lols. I couldnt contact YinPing so I doubt I will be going to the treetop walk tomorrow. Sorry to those who wanted me to go. Im really sorry. Please dont be angry at me alright? =) I hope you all will have fun tomorrow. For me, my only schedule for tomorrow is to study. = / A few more days it's exams. *sob* I 100% I gave up Chang already!!! *YES* finally!! I've been waiting for this day for quite some time. = D I dont really bother about him anymore. I viewed his friendster like how I view my close friend's friendster profile. = D be happy for me. YAY! = p But.. I think I like someone in school. I THINK only. So dont ask me who is it alright? I wont tell unless my feelings are confirmed. = ) Hope you all understand. It's only recently thingy. It might be infatuation. I think of him for no reasons. After school or what, Im always looking forward to find him. = / Unfortunately, I only know his name and looks. I doubt he know there's a 'CRYSTAL' exist in Manjusri. He seems like a nice guy. Perhaps it's really infatuation. shalala. My tongue got one ulcer at the side! *Ouch* I am having difficulties eating, talking and even swallowing my saliva. -.-" lols. -gone-

im starting to detest my life.

2005-05-04T22:20:00.000+08:00

Kes dont know i got blog but I want to apologise to him for my foolish acts today. I kept complaining to him about the pathetic of life of mine. Scared that he will find me irritating. = / Kes accompanied me quite long today. He say want bring me go beach. HAHA! =/ My life is disastrous. I basically love everyone except for a handful. Today went KCC.. Had alot of fun but too many people went there and make me didnt really study. Sickening. I came home, saw Chang online. = / His nick looked so dejected. I talked to him. He replied. How happy. Unfortunately, I found out the things that are meant not to know. He told me he still misses her. Khoo lied. Chang did not break up with her due to studies. It's because of alot of reasons. He still loves her alot. = / I knew it. I asked him to get her back. He said he want her to have a new life. = / I know he cried when we talked about this. All I did was to wanting to make him happy but eventually I made him cry. = / I actually almost lend him 20bucks as he is having financial problems now. He asked me to call him so that he can explain to me how to transfer the money to his atm account. -.- But in the end it was too late for me to go out.. He said nevermind. I heard his voice. It was so rough and I know he just cried. Frankly speaking, my heart hurts. I almost took a penknife to cut myself. Unfortunately, last time when I was addicted in cutting, Tin threw all penknifes away. = / I hate my secondary school life. I dont like the people I meet in secondary school. = / Sorry. I know I might offend someone by saying this but I've been used, been betrayed, and have been backstabbed before = / Not many people will understand how I feel. Sec1 that time, Ms Cheong said that Secondary School friends last longer than primary school friends. She's wrong. ARRRRRRRR! I want to scream. I want to die. = / Fooked up world = /